Aging, Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Gardening, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing


One day closer. Archie is on his dog bed chewing a bone. Stella is behind me asleep beneath a blanket on the love seat. Mother Nature gave us several inches of heavy wet snow last night. Today she is supposed to warm things up and give us rain. Depending on which weather person you listen to. I am merely hoping the main roads are clean so that I can make it to Elk Rapids and back safely.

I hate everyone walking on egg shells around me. I try very hard to keep the anger out but some little thing will go wrong and I snap. And the harder I try to control it the worse it is when I snap. So I try to keep everyone at a distance. I am going to have to tell them that they shouldn’t even ask me anymore to work extra shifts. My mental health turns rancid.

Mom’s birthday is coming up. It is Monday. I might try to go into Traverse 1. assuming I have the day off and 2. assuming she is still speaking to me. We butted heads last night because she tried to call me and I was at work. I explained that to her and then had to reexplain why I was at work. She remembered nothing of our previous conversation (which included a rant about my job and long hours). And I was the bad guy because I pointed out that I had already told her all this. This did not help things at my end any more than it did at hers.

So we’ll see how things go. It sounds like there will be random give aways at the tasting this afternoon. Atleast I will be fed. I have told everyone at work to make sure I am out the door by 1:30pm to make sure I get to Elk Rapids in time. It sounds like most of the managers don’t really want to go. This isn’t the first time we have dealt with Spartan/Nash but they want to show us their wares. And it breaks up the monotony of the day at work.

I ought to wrap this up. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, the World, Thinking, Travel, Writing


The wind has been tossing the tree tops around like a juggler. We are slated to get freezing rain today. I hope not but who knows anymore. I just hope the wind doesn’t blow out the furnace. I worry about the pups while I am at work. Tomorrow will be crazy enough without slippery roads. The tasting tomorrow is only supposed to take an hour but I don’t know I will get introduced to “Sue” while I am there or not. She is the person I am supposed to be helping put together a newsletter from the Elk Rapids store. Honestly I am not too keen on it as the last time I put all that time into it and it just got left. I asked for input and I got none.

Mom was blowing up my phone because I hadn’t responded to a text she sent after I went to bed. The fact that I had to get up at 4am didn’t seem to matter. Then when I also explained that I was working 10 days in a row so I might not respond right away she went off on that. I tried to explain that I did it to myself by agreeing to cover for a coworker that had a family emergency. I have yet to receive a response. I know her heart is in the right spot, but I really don’t have the energy to defend all this. I am trying my best to get through it. It is hard keeping the negative feelings out. I feel guilty because I just want to be left alone and everyone (especially Chris) is trying to be there for me. I am even snapping at the dogs.

I still need to water plants and shower before work. I meant to shower when I got home yesterday but I just didn’t have the energy. I stayed up as late as I could last night but still ended up awake at 7am. But I guess that will give me enough time to get things done around here before work. Geez…. I am watching the snow blow horizontally from east to west out there. The tops of the trees (and the bottom in some instances) are whipping around like screaming fans at a rock concert.

I am going to try to add some new photos. I have a second bloom opening on my cactus. I did want to share that. So I’d best get to it. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Cooking/Baking, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing


Normally today I would type “just one most shift” but today I find myself typing “just five more shifts.” 😳 I can sleep in the next three days. Let’s start there. (Oh and I just realized that even though I have next weekend off I will still have to go in Sunday morning at 5:30. I have to let the deli people in and, more to the point, I have to do my liquor order.)

Both pups are on the love seat sleeping. They are in almost a heart shaped head to head. They have been very good the past few days. Here’s to hoping that continues. I’ve told them I have to work on my days off. I have gotten treats as well.

Everything has been arranged for Tuesday as well. Around 1:30pm I will head out to Elk Rapids for the hour long tasting then go back to my store and finish my shift. Fortunately I am not manager that day so that makes things a little easier.

I think I have my food planned for my Oberon event. I have also talked to the deli manager to make sure I can cook there instead of at home and haul everything to the store. I am excited about the menu so far.

Fudge…. I just looked at the clock. I need to wrap this up. Thanks fir reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Gardening, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, the World, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Weather or Not

It has begun. If we get all the snow we are supposed to you may or may not see a post for tomorrow. We are supposed to get upwards of a foot (30cm) in the next 24 hours. I expect our deliveries at work will be off atleast a day. The only reason we would close is lack of staff. We’ll see what happens. We have been running a skeleton crew anyway.

Stella is still in bed. I find that interesting since she was trying to get me up at 7am. Archie is asleep behind me on the love seat. He enjoys the snow. I think he is the only one of us that does. He’ll play for hours out there running around and exploring. I am thinking about setting up a play area for him. Stella as well but mostly him because he will entertain himself by running and jumping and just nosing around. Stella is more of an interactive player. She wants someone to play with her.

Not much got done yesterday. Dishes, Stella’s nails got trimmed, toys got picked up. I have been reading Joe Hill’s The Fireman the past two days. I got it from Mom and have been waiting to read it since I ha some many other books going. So far so good. It’s from 2016 and has a pandemic. Normally I am not a fan of these kinds of stories. I don’t like “The Walking Dead” either. But this one caught my attention and I am enjoying it so far. It’s also the author’s favorite book that he has written.

I am continually looking out the windows watching the snow come down. I am just grateful I don’t have to drive all the way into Traverse anymore. Several people from work (including the owner) are coming back from vacation and flying in tomorrow. I wonder how many people will have delayed flights. And there goes a plow truck.

I supposed I will get this posted and start getting ready for work. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, Thinking, Travel, Writing

The Wow Factor

Things are getting crazy here in Michigan. They are shooting things out of our skies and there are shootings on college campus. And that’s just the past few days! Everything seems to just get worse and worse all over. I don’t know….

To add to the oddness of things poor Chris cannot sleep so he is up several hours before he should be. It means I can get started on the last bit of cleaning I have to do around the house but it means he will have a very long day and night at work.

Today is Valentine’s Day. We decided many years ago not to celebrate it like everyone else. Since our anniversary is a few days after we might as well just do one. I am always amazed at the people when they ask me why we don’t do both days. Don’t I want twice as many gifts? No, I don’t. That is not what those days are for. Those days are to celebrate what we have together. Not to spend all kinds of money. But maybe I’m just weird.

Sigh…. now the pups are going at it. Once Chris is up they know they can be loud and play. And they are. Which is fine. I want them to play. But it is very distracting when I am trying to write. I need to put the finishing touches on my article for Women of Horror month and get it sent it. Hopefully it will be one of the early releases. I also need to see if anyone else would like to be interviewed. We have a whole month for articles!

I also need to work on the novel today. Yesterday I focused on cleaning the house a bit. I only have a few more things to do around the house. I also came up with a plan for the bookshelves that Mom is giving me. So when we go into town on Friday we are taking the truck so we can bring it home. I need to order his desktop as well. We might be able to get that as well. There should be enough room for both in the back. While he puts his desk together I can move things out of the bedroom and get the bookcase set up.

Right. I need to get going on that article. I hope you have an amazing day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Cooking/Baking, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Step by Step

I slept as late as my body would let me. The sun was just starting to peek out. It is mostly blue sky again today. I hope to use that to my advantage. I have several work related things that I need to do today. But they shouldn’t take very long. I need to do a few things for myself today as well. I would like to try to do a bit of housework if I can. I would like to get things cleaned up a bit for us for our weekend together. I am rather excited to be making pasta for the first time on Saturday. I think I will make some ravioli. I am seriously thinking of doing the sauce from scratch as well. I have several recipes to choose from.

I also need to get my office clean. Part of that is the big pots of plants on the floor (the stacks of magazines and books aren’t helping either). I need to go through things in my office and figure out what I am doing in there. I would like to work more in there but there isn’t enough room to have the dogs. I need more bookcases (no, not less books). Mom has one that she is giving me but I need a space to put it. I have a few ideas but nothing solid. Every time I think I found a spot I see where it’s not going to work.

Nuts. My laptop has just gone into power saver mode. That means I need to pick up my pace with this. I hope to get some new photos to share soon. As the Spring and Summer progress there are a few new places that I would like to take the pups for walks that will have a lot of potential for new photos. We could all use the change.

I guess I need to get this posted. Sorry it is a bit rambly. I hope you have an amazing day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Gardening, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

The Middle of Nowhere

I slept in a little. But really not at all since I actually went to bed a lot later than intended. My body is used to staying up several hours after I get home from work. So it has been nothing for me to have just fallen asleep when Chris gets home. And my body is used to 8-8:30am being our wake up time so I have time to do this. Ironically I still have to go to work today. I was so used to just getting dinner for just. that night, I forgot to get enough for three days. So the kids and I will have to take back bottles and cans. I don’t know if I will have enough for everything. Thank goodness for 10 cent returnables!

The pups still aren’t sure about me staying home. They don’t quite believe it. I don’t either to be fair. I don’t really want to go out but I would like to get them out of the house. Stella especially. She hasn’t gone for a ride in months. I still have my little to do list for my two days off. On that list is talking to my parents. Honestly I just want to disconnect from everyone. I have dealt with customers and their problems for 8 days. I’m kinda over dealing with people right now.

I honestly don’t know what to write. My brain is just empty. It’s one of those break out the crayons and color because that doesn’t require any thought. I guess I will add some photos and get this posted. Sorry for the blahness of it all. Atleast it’s short! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Cooking/Baking, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Do I See A Light?

Today will not break me… Today will not break me… Last night was a near thing. I had a lot of customers/friends come in last night. I got a lot of love from everyone. And several good hugs. I told the pups that I still had one more shift to go, as they hunkered in on the love seat. The next time I turn to look at them they both have tear in their eyes and coming down their cheeks. That hit hard. They have been so very good. When I woke up this morning I seriously thought about not going anywhere tomorrow. But I think that they need some time outside of the house. And Archie needs to know that car rides don’t always mean going to the doctor. I think we will just stay in the area though. I don’t know what is wrong with the car yet.

I have heard back several times from the Brewery I contacted for my event in March. I am hoping that they send us some swag to pass out. I thought about doing it from 3-5pm but I might extend it to 6pm. That way anyone that gets out of work at 5pm has a chance to get there. I have several recipes to make but that will depend on when I can get ahold of the beer. If it is that day then it will be a long day for me at work because I will be cooking in the deli all day before the event. If they send the beer a few days before then I can piecemeal it out over two days. Although I might be able to ask the deli to cook for me as well. We’ll see.

I need to water my plants again already. My banana tree looked a bit sad after a few days of being happy. I checked and the dirt is bone dry. I checked several other plants and it is the same. So once I post this I will be going around and watering those that need it. Not all of them do. So I will check each one as I go. I am shocked at how dry some of them are! It’s like they haven’t been watered in a week or more.

I have limited funds this week so I have to make sure that I don’t go crazy. Car payment came out today so that was most of my check. I have to remind myself of that. When I feel like this I tend to overspend. I also need to figure out an anniversary gift for Chris. I am truly at a loss. I do plan to use the pasta maker I got for Christmas and make us some fresh pasta for dinner. Then we can use it together to do something. If I use it first I can hopefully get an understanding of it so that when we both use it, it goes smoothly.

Ok, I ought to get this posted and give the kids their treats. One more shift. One more shift. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Nudging Forward

The sky to the South is sunny with mostly blue sky. The sky to the North is so dark it is almost black. Archie is chewing on a bone from last night while Stella is dozing behind me under a blanket. It was hard to get up this morning. As tired as I was I just couldn’t get to sleep. But when I did I was out. Archie tried to get me up around 7am. Both our sleep schedules are way off.

Last night went better than expected. I had a customer give me a big batch of dog coats, toys and blankets. I put them in the washer when I got home. There is even a big saddle bag backpack! I haven’t tried it on either dog yet. That might be a fun add on for nature walks this Spring and Summer. Some of the coats will even fit Archie if needed. Archie has already adopted the frog toy. We played a lot with that before bed last night.

Both pups were awesome last night. A bag of bones was left on the counter (they were supposed to get them when Chris left for work but things got a little crazy) and neither dog tried to get them. Either of them could’ve easily pulled it off the counter. I am very proud of both of them!

As much as I don’t want to go anywhere on Thursday I might load up the dogs and do my running then. I don’t want Archie to not like going in the car. If we leave before Chris gets up then he can have some extra quiet time. Unless of course I have to drop the car off. But I think that might not be til later this week. We might even go to McDonald’s in Kalkaska for cheeseburgers. And a Happy Meal for me of course! Then I can come home and repot my plants. It is about time to give them some plant food too. I just did the last of the special food for the banana tree yesterday. I made it in a gallon jug so it will last awhile but there is no more in the packet that came with the plant to make after this.

I guess I will get this posted. It is a bitter cold here (way below freezing after the windchill) but no snow. Chris blew out the driveway before I went to work yesterday. Hopefully it will last. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

What Now?

Things are off this morning. Outside it looks like someone has sprinkled confectioners sugar all over. I am concerned with my car, Angus. By the time I pulled into the church parking lot Monday the engine did not sound right. I am hoping that the rest will make a difference. I’ll find out when I leave for work. I don’t have the money for car issues right now. I have to have the money for Archie’s vet appointment this coming Monday. I only hope that everything will be ok until then. But the next paycheck has to go toward my car payment.

I had my little to do list written out for yesterday but I did one thing on that list. Everything else is unaccounted for. Writing did not go as planned not did working with my plants. What I did manage to get done got done right before bed. I feel like I need another day off. But I close tonight and open tomorrow. I need to make sure that I only get what we need at the store. No treats for any of us. They are calling me on Friday to let me know the specifics for Archie’s surgery. I will need to remember to put the water bowl up on Sunday before we go to bed.

I hope that the kids don’t get into anything while I am gone. It seems more likely to happen when I am upset. And I am. Friday will also be the one year anniversary of Essie’s death. Did I mention how much I hate the month of January? I was looking at the calendar earlier and thought to myself that it is a good thing that I quit the paper. I would’ve had two meetings that someone else would’ve had to cover for me.

I have no new photos to share. It has been dark and very blah here. So I will share older ones. We seem to have a winter storm watch going on. The snow is coming in from the north. I know this because I can barely see across the road to the front of the house (which is north) and if I look out the back (this is south) things look clear with no snow. It doesn’t seem to be moving either. It’s almost like our road is the divider and the snow won’t cross it. Weird.

I need to wrap this up and atleast get my violet repotted before it dies. I was supposed to do that yesterday. Both pups are behind me asleep. I hope you have a good day. Thanks for reading and stay safe.