Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Holiday, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Adding Some Spice

I’m sorry I cannot work today. I have too much research and stuff to do at home. I got my research books yesterday before work and the one is precisely what I need for the novel. It is entitled “She-Wolf A Cultural History of Female Werewolves.” I only put it down last night because I was falling asleep. I also got my first package from The Mysterious Package Company. They have different scenarios that you can chose from. Most of them are horror related or can be dubbed scary. You get these boxes every month with clues and small mysteries that relate to the big one you are solving. They have been around for many many years. To my knowledge they are the first ones to do the mystery mailed to your house thing. I have wanted to do this for a long time. I have been on their email list and have seen various packages come and go. Well one that I wanted to try came back. It deals with Cthulhu (H.P. Lovecraft) and the Yellow King. Essentially a two for one deal. For the Yellow King I received a statue, a coin and a well worn book with a sheet of intercepted code. As I read the book I noticed that there are coded notes through out the book. I got a Cthulhu coin as well. I’m not sure how long this story goes on (I think I will receive things for several months in the mail) but I am very excited to finally be able to do this!

So you see I just can’t fit work into my schedule!

The girls have been very patient with me. I know that they need to play more especially since they are being left alone longer with me on nights all the time but they don’t push and they haven’t chewed up anything. They have also put up with me staying up late reading and writing in bed. They also let me sleep in usually. This morning Essie was ready to go almost as soon as the sun was up…. which is early. I am going to try to make more of an effort to play before work today. Essie has pretty much stayed outside since she ate. Stella is sleeping in front of the bedroom door.

Normally at this point in my week I would say I only have three more shirts to go but two of those shifts I am manager and I will be alone. Matt will be there closing but he isn’t going to stay after to help me. Which I completely understand. I will still be able to call or text him if I need to. Friday will be the real bear. I am my own closing cashier. I am not at all sure how that is going to work since there are things I have to do as manager as we get closer to closing time. It seems as though everyone’s shift is wonky atleast one day (usually more) this week.

The sun is out so I think I will follow Essie’s lead and go outside for a while. Hopefully the wind isn’t too cold like it has been over the past few days. We are still getting freeze warnings at night.

I hope all of you have a great day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, History, Learning, Life, Movies, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Hunting Monsters

Well I survived. I did pretty well too. I had a very irate customer leave laughing so I guess I did the right thing. The closing thing went fairly smoothly. Matt gave a few pointers here and there but pretty much left me to my own devices and just stayed incase I had questions. I said he would do the same on Saturday (I am grateful as it will be a very long day (11am-8pm but longer for me since I have to close up the store). Sooooo there we are. I’m not sure how busy we will be Saturday. We weren’t too bad yesterday but we had our moments.

I asked for either Saturday or Sunday of next week off so I could spend time with Chris. I’ve worked the past two weekends and my one weekend day was our one day together. We’ll see what happens.

There is nothing on the web site about tonight’s meeting. I don’t know if it is a Zoom meeting or in person. The last one got cancelled because they did not have enough board members present. So after I finish this I will have to call the government office. I also need to call the vet to get medicine for the girls. Today is their heartworm and flea and tick medicine dose due date. I will probably stop by work to get the girls their meat for dinner as well.

It is dark but pleasant outside. I feel comfortable with the door open. The big question is do I do my running before or after Chris gets up? I can make good reasons for either. I guess it will depend on when the vet can have my medicine ready.

I feel guilty because I have not done my reading/critique on the novel I am beta reading because I have been working on my own novel. I am way behind for her. I sent her an email a few weeks ago apologizing for not having sent her a response yet and explained why. Is that a legit excuse?

Gah… I hear my neighbor across the street mowing. I need to think about mowing the backyard here soon. The front yard is a batch of unimpressive weeds. Short weeds at that. The back however is a receptacle for pounds of dog poop and is thriving. At the very least I need to get out the weed whacker and trim in the gardens. Hopefully the battery is still plugged in in the garage. I will have to check.

I took an after sunset photo when I got home last night. I only had my phone camera on me (I was taking trash out). I also took several of my patient pups last night. They didn’t eat until around 10pm (I didn’t get home until around 9:30pm and then had to cut up and cook the chicken for them). They both wanted to go right to bed but I needed to unwind so I found a werewolf documentary to watch. It was only an hour or so and it dealt with some local legends (we have the Dogman up here in Northern Michigan). They stayed out on the couch while I watched my program.

I suppose I should call the vet and then get my running done. Oh and call the government building to find out what is going on with tonight’s meeting. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

Looking Within… A Little Too Deep

Stella is curled up behind me on the love seat. She has been my shadow since yesterday. Essie has curled up in the man cave. I shut the door to the bedroom while the girls were eating so Chris could get some sleep without them getting up and down from the bed. I don’t know what Stella’s issue was last night but she was in and out of bed til around 2:30am. She would get up and pace and then need to go outside every little while. I didn’t get much sleep. My back has found new and interesting ways to hurt as well.

I am trying not to think about work today. Me being anxious isn’t going to help anything. But I can feel the panic and anxiety building behind the wall I put up around it. I can also feel the little naysayers in my head starting to wake up too. On the plus side I have tomorrow off. I will have Matt there with me tonight working so if I have any problems or questions I will be ok. In theory. I still don’t know if I will walk into having keys and codes this afternoon or not. I ended up leaving a note to remind the store manager.

Yesterday was not a flop but it feels like it. I had such grand plans in my head but I didn’t get near the amount of things done that I had hoped. The flip side of that is I was able to relax for a few hours. Which is really what I needed. I was able to breath and I played with the dogs enough that they would nap for extended periods. I did get some research done on my novel but I didn’t get the amount of work done on my novel that I wanted to. I did get some photos taken but I didn’t do anything with all the photos I already have. I talked with Mom because I was worried about her. She usually sends me updates on how the house clean out is going. She’s been doing pretty good with it. But I hadn’t heard anything in a while so I decided to call and check on her (even though I said I wasn’t going to call anyone). She was out and about so she called when she got home. Three hours later we hung up. I’m glad I called because she obviously needed to talk to someone. Then there is always the “but” in my head. It’s not like I would’ve done great things with my time if I wasn’t on the phone with her but my head always says “what if” and then goes from there. I was going through my Supernatural dvds and watching my favorite episodes when she called. Hardly earth shattering. Odds are I would’ve squeezed in a few more episodes before bed and that was it.

This morning I got a text from Dad and he’d not doing too good. He is getting more frustrated and scared with his condition. He can’t articulate the way he’s feeling physically or mentally. He is scared that early Alzheimer’s is setting in. I’ll tell you what freaks me out is that both my parents are going through the same thing. Mind you they are divorced and Mom wants nothing to do with Dad so I don’t really share any updates or anything. Neither really knows what the other is going through. But they do because they complain to me of the same things. Forgetting words or ideas mid-conversation, unable to focus especially for extended periods, unable to complete tasks because they forgot what they were doing or how to complete said task…. Some times it would be easy to forget which one I was talking to once they start voicing their concerns. It is scary.

I guess that is why yesterday feels so much like a failure. I had to face mortality and see that it didn’t matter what I did or said or wrote there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Well this isn’t where I had intended to go with the post this morning. I guess I had better wrap this up and either work on my novel or write to my pen pal. Which reminds me I need to get post card stamps on the way to work. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Exercise, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

My Happy Place

My day off! Yesssss! It will be hard to do anything other than read and write today. I got my research books (although I am angry with UPS as it was raining out and they left the boxes out in the rain so some of the books got some water damage) and I got a letter from my pen pal. Giggity! I almost skipped this but it is a serious part of my writing routine and I can’t.

I want to give a shout out and a thank you to tanyafyfe for sending me a message yesterday to let me know that the rock eating dog Ike is still with us. He has been adopted yet again by a third person who has paid for his surgery (again). I hope Ike stops eating rocks. He is a very lucky boy to have all these people willing to help him. (Go check out her blog http://tanyafyfe.com/)

Despite the cold Nature is pushing forward with Spring. Things are greener and fuller each day. It has been raining on and off for several days now so there has been a lot of growth.

After a miserable physical therapy appointment (my therapist has not given up per say but is at a loss as to what to do to help so we are just going to do the allotted amount so I can qualify to get the MRI done on my back to see what is going on) I came home and no one knew. I was home almost two hours when Chris and the girls got up. I was surprised that I was able to stay so quiet.

Even though I really need to work on my photography I need to work on my writing. I have been slacking on my beta novel reading again. So I will probably do another three chapters today. I am very excited about the research books I got! I managed to find just what I needed this round. And yes the photo does show a book teaching Norwegian. I am familiar with Italian (and I have language reference books because it is a language I hope to learn) but not so much with Norwegian. Since I am using both countries in my novel (yes it is getting bigger) I figured I should be familiar with the language (I plan to use brief bits of each countries language… yes I will translate). And since I have Norwegian blood in me…. why not!

Off I go to work on my novel and get my letter written to my pen pal (I still haven’t heard anything from my British one so I will assume after a few months that she is not interested in having me as a pen pal. Ah well. Thanks for reading and all the supportive comments! You folks rock! Stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Holiday, Learning, Life, Motorcycles, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Riding, Thinking, Writing

Adulting Is Hard

I feel like I am underneath a brick wall right now. I didn’t get home until almost 10pm last night. Despite having done pretty much everything on Wednesday night I had a hard time remembering what needed to be done and in what order last night. Matt was very patient with me. It helps that our brains work the same way so he was able to help more than others could. Next week I am on my own. I won’t have a co-manager with me. I will have another manager working as cashier or at the gas counter but I am the lone wolf next week. Yay. I still don’t have my keys nor my codes. If I get them today I will feel a bit better about things. As it is I still haven’t been able to do everything because I don’t have my codes. We will see today when I get there.

I didn’t get to bed until late again. Getting home so late is hard because my brain won’t let me sleep for a few hours after I get home. Sooooo I’m gonna be lacking in the sleep department again for a bit. Essie and I still try to get up at 8am (that didn’t happen today mind you) because that is my quiet time to get my writing done. This is going to be difficult if I’m not get to bed until late. But I need to keep trying.

Today is International Female Ride Day. Besides how I feel it is supposed to rain. So my ride today will be a bust. I am disappointed. I had hoped to pull out Rogue (my motorcycle) and atleast shake some dust off my riding skills. Yesterday it was just going to be overcast. As of this morning it will be rain. But it might be a blessing in disguise. My head it just not in it with everything going on at work. And not sure about parking either. With construction going on with the building expansion employee parking has been squished into the main lot. No one wants to park near the entrance due to the craziness of many of the drivers. And I am not sure there would be a safe spot to park Rogue. So maybe that is ok. I can’t spend my whole shift worrying about whether or not some idiot has backed over my bike.

I got a load of laundry done and dishes caught up when I got home last night. So I feel good about that. The girls and I played a bit so they were a bit tired out when we went to bed. Although they we not happy with me leaving the light on for so long.

Monday I have physical therapy early and then I work that night. Such a joy that will be! But I do have Tuesday off so I can hopefully stay home and work on my writing. A bunch of my research books are due to arrive Monday. I am looking forward to that!

I went through my backlog of emails this morning as well. I deleted A LOT. I had things from two and three years ago. I kept some stuff like birthday wishes from various sources but I got rid of a couple hundred emails. Yay!

I should wrap this up. I need to delete some of my old photos from when I first started this blog as I am running out of space to upload my new photos. So there may be a few posts without photos in the near future. Hopefully not but we’ll see. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

Making A Way Forward

Have you ever gotten so much accomplished on your day off that you are exhausted the next day? That is me. I got work done on my novel, I got caught up on the chapters I am going over as a beta reader, I talked to both my parents, I did some housework and I finally caught up on the Supernatural series. The last one was hard. 15 years I have watched the series and it has come to an end.

The girls and I went to bed at a decent time but I still feel like I didn’t get enough sleep. I still have to go get groceries before I work this afternoon. I work at 1pm but I wanted to get groceries before since it is a fairly big list this week. Then I can come home and shower and head back out for work.

Essie has been coming out to get love from me every few minutes. I’m not sure why. Stella went right back into bed after she ate. I found two accidents in the hall. It was raining when we went to bed so even though I got both girls to go outside there is no guarantee that they went potty. I’m pretty sure it was Stella that had the accidents.

I keep watching all the birds go by outside. The sky is blue and the sun is out (for once). The grass is a lush green. I’m going to have to mow the yard soon. I know the battery is charged so that will make it easy. I need to check the bird feeder again today since it has been so busy the past few days. I also need to check my plants. When I did the other day no one seemed to need any water but it gets so dry in the house that I try to check them every few days.

The wind has really picked up outside. Must be why my mind feels so restless. It can focus but when it get s windy like this it just feels like it is pacing in a cage. I did get a few photos taken yesterday. Some of them turned out pretty good. I still need to sit down with my photography site and figure out what I want to do with it. All I have done it add photos here and there and occasionally share the link. If I am going to be serious about selling my photos I need to do a bit more than that. So some thing for my next day off. If I try it today then I will not have time to get groceries or get other things done before work. So on the check list for later.

Speaking of which I do need to get this wrapped up if I am going to get everything done. Oh please little bird don’t try to come in the house…. there is a small birch hanging around just outside the sliding glass door. Some times they try to come inside when the door is open. Ok, the little one flew off. So I will download some photos and get this posted. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Feeling Good

The first night of training is under my belt. It lasted about an hour and a half longer than if I was just on the floor but that’s ok. I did learn a lot. I just have to retain it. I have today off then I got at it again on Friday. On of my coworkers was so funny. He’s maybe 16 or 17 years old and kept going on about how I was growing up so fast when he learned that I was doing the training. He’s just a sweet nut! Lol.

I did manage to eek in my Morning Pages yesterday. That is also one of the reasons I was up so late. Between me and Stella getting up several times to go outside I think we got to bed around 2:30-3am. Essie was up and ready to go at 8am. So here we are. I am glad I have to day off. I plan to work on my novel as well as take notes on the book I am beta reader for. I am behind a few days so I need to reread atleast three chapters today. I also need to see if Dad will Facetime. He is having a very hard time of it lately. He is scared that it is an onset of Alzheimer’s. Living alone with no real contact with the outside (he lives in Montreal and they are under quarantine) is also a contributing factor. But it happened to his mother and he has been terrified of it ever since. And getting a response from his doctor is near impossible. So I will try to help if he can deal with the physical pain (he has arthritis in his neck and back as well as fused discs for starters). We’ll see.

I remembered to put in my events that I had for next week even though I got my physical therapy time wrong. I wrote 8:15am instead of 8:45am. I had forgotten to grab my note paper when I left for work so I was winging it. So I hope the schedule for next week is ok. I am paranoid that I got my days or times wrong. Which I did but not too bad. My brain is still worrying on it though. Unfixable mistakes is what the brain is worried about.

I am going to (hopefully) share a short video clip with you. We have the two ponds in the backyard. This year we have two peepers that are living there. Right now they are in the big pond but I have heard them in the smaller one as well. Last night I was able to record them singing together. I hope the clip posts!

I didn’t get any photos before work so I don’t really have much new to share. I did get a cute picture of Essie with my phone. I was shocked that she actually posed for the phone photo. she normally won’t look at the camera if she knows that I am using the phone camera. I will make it a point to get some new photos today. I do need to download photos onto my laptop both off my phone and camera. My phone has over 11,000 photos. Holy crap! And yes most of them are dogs photos. Don’t judge. Lol.

I’d better wrap this up so I can get it posted. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Friends, History, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

The Little Engine That Could But Chose Not To

I said I needed to be out the door by 9am today. I hurt and I really don’t’ feel like rushing around on my day off. The girls are stuck out here with me. When I leave and it’s not for work they will go in and out of the bedroom until I get back home. So I said I would shut the bedroom door to keep them out here while I do my running today. I had several places I was going to go today but I just hurt so my list keeps getting smaller. I would whittle the list down to one place but I need to get a few things before I run out. Sooooo…. But I am seriously thinking about not going all the way into Traverse to the bank. Problem is that is the closest branch. I am hoping I can scoot in and out quickly. I have to deposit cash otherwise I would be banking via my phone app. Looking at the clock tells me that I won’t be leaving at 9am. Oh well.

Physical therapy was a mess. Everything we tried I could only do for a limited amount of time if at all. One of the exercises that I did on my first day I can no longer do. Everything they have suggested I have tried doing before I even decided to go to a doctor. And things are just getting worse. I told the gal I had yesterday that I felt bad because it was like I was giving them too much information. She was very nice but I think she was getting frustrated.

I did my morning pages yesterday as well as going over another chapter for the author I am beta reading for. My goal is a chapter a day (or more) so I can get my notes together and send them out. I am hoping to do some more work on my novel today. But I seem to be doing mostly research, which is fine, but I feel that I am not working on the story (even though I am). I am making progress just not in the way I normally look for. I have managed to pick places that have limited info available on what I need. I hate to make things up (hahaha) but I like to base my work with some bits of truth and history in them. So I toil away at finding just what I need.

Alright, I guess I ought to wrap this up and get myself out the door. I am only running a few minutes late. Stella is upset with me. She has curled up on the couch as far away as she can get from me. Essie is asleep in the man cave by the sliding glass door. Here’s to hoping that I can get it all done and be back to meet my friend in Kalkaska by 11am. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Holiday, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Rambling…

I got to sleep in for the most part. We did stay up rather late again. Today is my last day before I officially become an manager trainee. I have mixed feelings. However I’m trying not to think too much about it. That being said I’m meeting up with a former coworker on Tuesday to catch up. She too has gotten a promotion at her job. I texted her out of the blue last night and we got to chatting. We haven’t seen each other for several months.

I took a lot of photos yesterday and played a lot with the girls but not much else. No writing. No research. Nothing constructive. It felt good to do nothing but at the same time I was disappointed in myself. I am trying to follow a new writing system but I did nothing with it last night.

I did find an awesome bit of fossil in the yard while I was taking photographs. I believe it is a bit of coral. I shared it on a rockhound page that I belong to to see if anyone had any ideas. The twin centers are filled with crystals that sparkle when you move it. I am very excited about this find!

This weekend is the Annual Trout Festival in Kalkaska (about 10 minutes away). I don’t know how busy we will be at the store. I am curious as to how busy the festival will be. I guess they will be bussing people in and masks will be required, even outdoors. It can go either way. Regardless it is the beginning of trout season up here so there may be some flyfishing gear that will be coming out of the closet soon (and no it won’t be me).

The clouds have come out thick this morning. It was sunny when the girls and I got up but now it looks like someone covered the sky in great wads of dirty cotton batting. The temperature is nice though. I have the door open. My mind is wandering. I think I will wrap this up and then go outside and read for a bit. I should be writing but…. I hope all of you have a great day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Poetry, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Exploring

It’s a very late post for me. I just couldn’t fall asleep last night. I finally managed it around 1am. I was completely exhausted but I still could not go to sleep. I am a loss. Another odd thing going on… the girls aren’t eating all of their kibble. Atleast a quarter (sometimes more) of the food gets left. And they eat less if I leave them to it and go do other things. If I am standing in the kitchen with them they will eat more. I may try a new kibble on Thursday since I have the day off and can monitor them to see if they cope well with the change. I will gradually change over to the new stuff.

It is still cold here. Winter temperatures sadly. This year Spring has been through all seasons several times. Sometimes in the same day!

Work is getting busier. But we are going to have less people working soon. Two of the gals are going to nursing school so they will be working at the local hospital. I am very happy for them. We are also expanding the store. I am excited to see what they do with it. I am pushing to get a small garden center put in. I think I have gotten a favorable response so we’ll see. Naturally I have offered my services.

Not many photos have gotten taken so I may pick some old ones to share. I will try not to duplicate. I did bring home another plant. This one is a Gerber daisy. I love them! There is no scent to them (and really the hyacinth is scented enough lol) but they have such vivid colors and the days have been dark lately. Once things warm up I may try some night time photography. On a night where there are shooting stars etc. We’ll see.

I am working more on my creative side the past few days. I received my current issue of Poets & Writers yesterday. I spent some quality time reading that. I have found a few poets that I think I will read. I put their books on my wish list so that I don’t forget which ones I want first. Though not a poet myself I find that I drift back to that medium every little while.

But I do need to get this wrapped up so I can get going for work. Thanks for your wonderful comments! Thank you for reading and stay safe!