Animals, anxiety, Cooking/Baking, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Life, Nature, retail, the World, Thinking

Is It Saturday Yet?

And so it begins….yesterday was hell on many levels. We were short staffed (we only had four people between the deli and front line workers), the tourists are starting to arrive (this is a mixed bag as some are very nice then there are the others that are just there to “enjoy the peace and quiet” by making more noise and mess) and the CDC lifted the mask rule. A lot of folks aren’t happy about wearing a mask. I get it. I’m not either. But ever since the announcement yesterday afternoon we have had people coming in without masks proclaiming that they no longer had to wear them. Well guess what? Our bosses said that they still had to be worn in the store so you have to have them on when you are in the store! Oh and by the way you have to have proof that you were vaccinated to not have to wear the mask. You can’t just opt out. And tonight I am closing manager.

The doctor needs to figure out what is going on with my back. Normally I can fake my way through work then just nurse my back at home. Not so yesterday. It hurt going into work and by the time I was done I just wanted to cry. Once home I could barely walk. A shower didn’t help either. This morning is rough going. And it will be another 10+ hour day.

The girls have been very sweet. Right now Stella is laying next to me on the floor. Essie has been in and out this morning (this sun is out and the temperature is rising at a steady rate). She is my little sun bunny. Both of them have been keeping an eye on me.

A bright spot yesterday is that my new lounge chair arrived. I am finally replacing my old one. It is 6 or 7 years old and in need of repairs. The new one is a lovely convertible chair. It can be stretched out so I can lay in the sun or set up as a zero gravity chair. I tried it out last night. It is wonderful! It even has a small removable pillow. I am hoping to spend quality time using it tomorrow.

Sadly I have to leave the house tomorrow. I need to get groceries and the ingredients for Saturday’s dinner. Armadillo eggs. Yep. I thought the same thing when I heard it. In short it is jalapeño peppers (cleaned out) stuffed with cream cheese, wrapped in a layer of Italian sausage which is in turned wrapped in a layer of bacon. This is smoked for several hours then (I believe) grilled. We are both looking forward to this culinary delight! I just don’t want to leave the house let alone go to my place of work on my day off. Oh well!

I need to wrap this up. (Pardon the pun.) Sorry about the complaining. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Holiday, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Adding Some Spice

I’m sorry I cannot work today. I have too much research and stuff to do at home. I got my research books yesterday before work and the one is precisely what I need for the novel. It is entitled “She-Wolf A Cultural History of Female Werewolves.” I only put it down last night because I was falling asleep. I also got my first package from The Mysterious Package Company. They have different scenarios that you can chose from. Most of them are horror related or can be dubbed scary. You get these boxes every month with clues and small mysteries that relate to the big one you are solving. They have been around for many many years. To my knowledge they are the first ones to do the mystery mailed to your house thing. I have wanted to do this for a long time. I have been on their email list and have seen various packages come and go. Well one that I wanted to try came back. It deals with Cthulhu (H.P. Lovecraft) and the Yellow King. Essentially a two for one deal. For the Yellow King I received a statue, a coin and a well worn book with a sheet of intercepted code. As I read the book I noticed that there are coded notes through out the book. I got a Cthulhu coin as well. I’m not sure how long this story goes on (I think I will receive things for several months in the mail) but I am very excited to finally be able to do this!

So you see I just can’t fit work into my schedule!

The girls have been very patient with me. I know that they need to play more especially since they are being left alone longer with me on nights all the time but they don’t push and they haven’t chewed up anything. They have also put up with me staying up late reading and writing in bed. They also let me sleep in usually. This morning Essie was ready to go almost as soon as the sun was up…. which is early. I am going to try to make more of an effort to play before work today. Essie has pretty much stayed outside since she ate. Stella is sleeping in front of the bedroom door.

Normally at this point in my week I would say I only have three more shirts to go but two of those shifts I am manager and I will be alone. Matt will be there closing but he isn’t going to stay after to help me. Which I completely understand. I will still be able to call or text him if I need to. Friday will be the real bear. I am my own closing cashier. I am not at all sure how that is going to work since there are things I have to do as manager as we get closer to closing time. It seems as though everyone’s shift is wonky atleast one day (usually more) this week.

The sun is out so I think I will follow Essie’s lead and go outside for a while. Hopefully the wind isn’t too cold like it has been over the past few days. We are still getting freeze warnings at night.

I hope all of you have a great day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Life, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

It is cold and windy outside. No one wanted to get up this morning. Least of all me. But we did. I figured I would take care of the girls and do this before I left for the meeting. When I get back I will write the two articles and send them in.

I got a lot done yet nothing at all yesterday. Does that make sense? I did dishes, worked on my novel, wrote my penpal… but the list is longer of things that I did not do. Like vacuum, call my parents, play enough with the girls clean the bedding (ours and theirs). My mind is trying to build up a case to not keep my new position at the store. It is a big change but I can do it. If I can talk my mind off of the ledge. My new anxiety is probably the hardest part of taking the promotion.

I keep looking at the clock to make sure I’m not running late. It is gonna be close. I have both girls in the living room so there won’t be too much hassle when I get home. I don’t have to be at work until 2pm.

The girls and I did play yesterday. Essie and I seemed to be equally tired though. The sun did come out and stay for a few hours so that made things more tolerable if chilly.

Sorry this is so short. I gotta fly. Thanks for reading and stay safe! And thanks for the continued support!❤️

Dogs, Emotions, family, Life, Nature, retail, the World, Thinking

Frustrations

I am trying my hardest not to be angry right now. It is not easy. My alarm was set for 6:45am. I have gotten maybe 2 hours of sleep because I could not get comfortable. Then at 6:22am (I know because I had just looked at the clock) Essie had to go out. She couldn’t wait another 15 minutes. And she was out until about 5 minutes before my alarm went off. It’s not her fault. She had an upset tummy.

Stella got up when I was supposed to and had her breakfast then went potty. Both girls are back in bed. I wish I was back in bed too. All these physical therapy appointments were made when I wasn’t working nights all the time. I just have three more so it seems silly to change them now. I just want them over with. But then it will be make another appointment to see the doctor so we can set up an appointment to get an MRI done on my back.

I have no idea what my therapist will try today. I don’t think much. At the last appointment she said that she would let my doctor know that therapy wasn’t working so I didn’t have to come for the last few appointments. I told her I had to have them in order for insurance to let me get an MRI to see what is wrong. So she said we’d just try not to make things worse.

The summer is going to be fun if we have to enforce the masks. All the people from downstate don’t wear them anymore. Then there are the ones up here who either have been vaccinated and think that they don’t have to wear them or they are just not going to wear them. I am tired of having things thrown at me. It is company policy. I didn’t make the rules. There seem to be more and more people getting nasty about having to wear a mask in the store. We had two guys wear their handguns into the store and no masks. Since I was manager guess who got to go ask them to put on masks (and for the record we provide masks if they don’t have one to wear)? Yeah, that was fun. The one guy threw his food when I finally cornered him (he kept ducking around corners) and his buddy completely ignored me (that didn’t work either because when he got to the check out he had to put one on to check out).

I guess I had better wrap this up so I can go to physical therapy. Essie keeps getting in and out of bed again. She stayed in there for about 30 minutes this time before she started getting restless. It’s gonna be a long day. I hope yours goes well. Thanks for reading and be safe.

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Holiday, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, the World, Thinking, Writing

The Mother’s Day Mix

Here in the U.S. it is Mother’s Day. While Mother’s do deserve the praise and a day I am just not feeling it. For myself mind you… I sent a text to Mom and I got a lovely text from my Mother-in-law that I responded to in kind. No this is my first Mother’s Day without Moose. Yes I have the girls and I love them dearly but I had a special connection with Moosie. I have to work today so I guess it will be another work day for me.

I did survive last night. Quite well as it turned out. We had customers late and I had to turn away several people after we closed. Everyone was nice but peeved. It didn’t help that we were short staffed. But all turned out well. I even made great strides in mastering the paperwork. Which is a good thing since I will be completely on my own next week. So I am pretty proud of that.

The sun is out for the second day in a row. It is a nice change from the dark, rain and cold. I am hoping tomorrow will be more of the same. It is chilly if you are not in the sun but I am usually in the sun so…. Tomorrow at this time I should be home from physical therapy. I have a meeting tomorrow night then another Tuesday morning. My days off are tomorrow then Saturday so I can spend some time with Chris.

I am contemplating how to spend my little bit of time before work today. There is a list of things I should do (like clean out the photos in my cache here, on my phone and on the camera) as well as things I could do (which includes reading, working on my novel, writing my penpal, working in the yard (not a good idea with my back but…)). But I’m not sure what I will do though. Both girls are outside. I think outside is a good place to start. Even if I am just sitting.

Sorry this is short and kind of all over the place. I am trying not to think too much about Moose. But everything seems to pull me back to him today. I will add a few photos from the past few days. I hope you all have a great day and to those who are celebrating have an awesome Mother’s Day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Life, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Brief but colorful

My body just would not let me sleep last night. I got maybe three hours if I was lucky. Work went really well. I was surprised at how much I remembered from working in the deli last (which was a few months ago). So go me!

I’m not looking forward to today. Just get it over with. No schedule yet for next week. I guess someone turned in some day off requests very late (like Friday morning late). I’m really hoping for Monday off, The sun is out so we will probably be busy today.

Not sure what is going on with either the laptop of the WordPress site right now. I’ll be typing along and everything just stops working. No key strokes are registered etc. Very annoying.

I did get some interesting last minute photos yesterday. After I got home Essie just was running up and down the fence barking like crazy. Well it turns out that it was a neighbor’s dog that had gotten loose and decided to come over for a visit. I got a few photos of him. The clouds last night were really cool so there are a lot of those. I will need to pick and chose since I still haven’t taken the time to clean out my old photos from here.

Sorry this is so short. I have a bunch of stuff to do before I head out to work today. I hope you like the photos! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, History, Learning, Life, Movies, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Hunting Monsters

Well I survived. I did pretty well too. I had a very irate customer leave laughing so I guess I did the right thing. The closing thing went fairly smoothly. Matt gave a few pointers here and there but pretty much left me to my own devices and just stayed incase I had questions. I said he would do the same on Saturday (I am grateful as it will be a very long day (11am-8pm but longer for me since I have to close up the store). Sooooo there we are. I’m not sure how busy we will be Saturday. We weren’t too bad yesterday but we had our moments.

I asked for either Saturday or Sunday of next week off so I could spend time with Chris. I’ve worked the past two weekends and my one weekend day was our one day together. We’ll see what happens.

There is nothing on the web site about tonight’s meeting. I don’t know if it is a Zoom meeting or in person. The last one got cancelled because they did not have enough board members present. So after I finish this I will have to call the government office. I also need to call the vet to get medicine for the girls. Today is their heartworm and flea and tick medicine dose due date. I will probably stop by work to get the girls their meat for dinner as well.

It is dark but pleasant outside. I feel comfortable with the door open. The big question is do I do my running before or after Chris gets up? I can make good reasons for either. I guess it will depend on when the vet can have my medicine ready.

I feel guilty because I have not done my reading/critique on the novel I am beta reading because I have been working on my own novel. I am way behind for her. I sent her an email a few weeks ago apologizing for not having sent her a response yet and explained why. Is that a legit excuse?

Gah… I hear my neighbor across the street mowing. I need to think about mowing the backyard here soon. The front yard is a batch of unimpressive weeds. Short weeds at that. The back however is a receptacle for pounds of dog poop and is thriving. At the very least I need to get out the weed whacker and trim in the gardens. Hopefully the battery is still plugged in in the garage. I will have to check.

I took an after sunset photo when I got home last night. I only had my phone camera on me (I was taking trash out). I also took several of my patient pups last night. They didn’t eat until around 10pm (I didn’t get home until around 9:30pm and then had to cut up and cook the chicken for them). They both wanted to go right to bed but I needed to unwind so I found a werewolf documentary to watch. It was only an hour or so and it dealt with some local legends (we have the Dogman up here in Northern Michigan). They stayed out on the couch while I watched my program.

I suppose I should call the vet and then get my running done. Oh and call the government building to find out what is going on with tonight’s meeting. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

Looking Within… A Little Too Deep

Stella is curled up behind me on the love seat. She has been my shadow since yesterday. Essie has curled up in the man cave. I shut the door to the bedroom while the girls were eating so Chris could get some sleep without them getting up and down from the bed. I don’t know what Stella’s issue was last night but she was in and out of bed til around 2:30am. She would get up and pace and then need to go outside every little while. I didn’t get much sleep. My back has found new and interesting ways to hurt as well.

I am trying not to think about work today. Me being anxious isn’t going to help anything. But I can feel the panic and anxiety building behind the wall I put up around it. I can also feel the little naysayers in my head starting to wake up too. On the plus side I have tomorrow off. I will have Matt there with me tonight working so if I have any problems or questions I will be ok. In theory. I still don’t know if I will walk into having keys and codes this afternoon or not. I ended up leaving a note to remind the store manager.

Yesterday was not a flop but it feels like it. I had such grand plans in my head but I didn’t get near the amount of things done that I had hoped. The flip side of that is I was able to relax for a few hours. Which is really what I needed. I was able to breath and I played with the dogs enough that they would nap for extended periods. I did get some research done on my novel but I didn’t get the amount of work done on my novel that I wanted to. I did get some photos taken but I didn’t do anything with all the photos I already have. I talked with Mom because I was worried about her. She usually sends me updates on how the house clean out is going. She’s been doing pretty good with it. But I hadn’t heard anything in a while so I decided to call and check on her (even though I said I wasn’t going to call anyone). She was out and about so she called when she got home. Three hours later we hung up. I’m glad I called because she obviously needed to talk to someone. Then there is always the “but” in my head. It’s not like I would’ve done great things with my time if I wasn’t on the phone with her but my head always says “what if” and then goes from there. I was going through my Supernatural dvds and watching my favorite episodes when she called. Hardly earth shattering. Odds are I would’ve squeezed in a few more episodes before bed and that was it.

This morning I got a text from Dad and he’d not doing too good. He is getting more frustrated and scared with his condition. He can’t articulate the way he’s feeling physically or mentally. He is scared that early Alzheimer’s is setting in. I’ll tell you what freaks me out is that both my parents are going through the same thing. Mind you they are divorced and Mom wants nothing to do with Dad so I don’t really share any updates or anything. Neither really knows what the other is going through. But they do because they complain to me of the same things. Forgetting words or ideas mid-conversation, unable to focus especially for extended periods, unable to complete tasks because they forgot what they were doing or how to complete said task…. Some times it would be easy to forget which one I was talking to once they start voicing their concerns. It is scary.

I guess that is why yesterday feels so much like a failure. I had to face mortality and see that it didn’t matter what I did or said or wrote there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Well this isn’t where I had intended to go with the post this morning. I guess I had better wrap this up and either work on my novel or write to my pen pal. Which reminds me I need to get post card stamps on the way to work. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Exercise, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

My Happy Place

My day off! Yesssss! It will be hard to do anything other than read and write today. I got my research books (although I am angry with UPS as it was raining out and they left the boxes out in the rain so some of the books got some water damage) and I got a letter from my pen pal. Giggity! I almost skipped this but it is a serious part of my writing routine and I can’t.

I want to give a shout out and a thank you to tanyafyfe for sending me a message yesterday to let me know that the rock eating dog Ike is still with us. He has been adopted yet again by a third person who has paid for his surgery (again). I hope Ike stops eating rocks. He is a very lucky boy to have all these people willing to help him. (Go check out her blog http://tanyafyfe.com/)

Despite the cold Nature is pushing forward with Spring. Things are greener and fuller each day. It has been raining on and off for several days now so there has been a lot of growth.

After a miserable physical therapy appointment (my therapist has not given up per say but is at a loss as to what to do to help so we are just going to do the allotted amount so I can qualify to get the MRI done on my back to see what is going on) I came home and no one knew. I was home almost two hours when Chris and the girls got up. I was surprised that I was able to stay so quiet.

Even though I really need to work on my photography I need to work on my writing. I have been slacking on my beta novel reading again. So I will probably do another three chapters today. I am very excited about the research books I got! I managed to find just what I needed this round. And yes the photo does show a book teaching Norwegian. I am familiar with Italian (and I have language reference books because it is a language I hope to learn) but not so much with Norwegian. Since I am using both countries in my novel (yes it is getting bigger) I figured I should be familiar with the language (I plan to use brief bits of each countries language… yes I will translate). And since I have Norwegian blood in me…. why not!

Off I go to work on my novel and get my letter written to my pen pal (I still haven’t heard anything from my British one so I will assume after a few months that she is not interested in having me as a pen pal. Ah well. Thanks for reading and all the supportive comments! You folks rock! Stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Putting It All Together

Such a day! The first part of my shift didn’t go all that well but it got better as it went along. When I got home I had the new issue of Rue Morgue waiting for me as well as my box of lotions from Bath & Body Works. Yay! I was also able to spend some quality time with the family. It has been a bit since we all spent more than a few minutes together. So the day ended on a good note. A coconut scented one too. I got a nice long shower in and I used one of my new lotions.

I have to make a special effort to remember what day it is. My schedule is all over the place since I took the promotion. I am a bit frustrated as I still have yet to get my keys and codes. If they are only going to train me for two days before letting me off on my own then I need to have all my equipment. I believe Wednesday and Saturday are my two nights I am manager this week. I also have to remember that I have a physical therapy appointment tomorrow morning. I set an alarm. With the way the days are blurring together I am worried about forgetting something. I made my car payment today as well. Before I forget that.

I am hoping that my day off Tuesday (I have a meeting that night to cover) will allow me to get my headspace cleared up. It feels like everything is rushing through changes and I am fighting to keep up. My big concern is the manager training. I don’t feel two days is enough before throwing me in the deep end. I talked to Matt (who is training me) and he has offered to stay with me one of the nights after close. I told him that I wanted to make myself a check list so that I had something to follow. I think that will be a big help having some thing to reference instead of trying to remember something I have only done twice.

I got a few photos taken yesterday. I found a rogue tulip in one of my gardens that has a big bud on it. I am excited to see what color it is! Hopefully the temperatures stay decent enough that it doesn’t die before it blooms. I also found a third type of daffodil in the garden! It has smaller flowers and blooms in clusters of three or so. Very delicate yellow color. I took some photos with both the Nikon and the cell phone camera of the sunset colors. There are almost no colors in the photos from the Nikon. Yet my phone camera can capture the colors. (Neither seems to capture the purples and blues for some reason.) I am still trying to work out that mystery.

Tomorrow’s blog should be at a regular early morning time since I have a physical therapy appointment. I’m still not sure about the rest of the week. I close all week but hopefully I can get myself to bed before 1am. I hope. Poor Essie. She can’t find a comfortable place to lay because she hurts (too much frisbee the past few days). You can see it’s her back legs and hips that are giving her trouble when she walks. Damn it. When I call to get their medicine tomorrow I will see if I can get her some pain medicine.

Ok, I am going to stop blathering on. Lol. Thanks for reading and thanks for the awesome comments as well as the support! Stay safe!