Aging, Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Friends, Gardening, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Release!

I didn’t get out of bed until 10am this morning. Mind you I didn’t get to bed til after 1am, but still, I slept in for once. I still feel like I could sleep for a few days it feels good to have slept in. When I called last night to find out about jury duty I was so relieved to hear that it had been cancelled. I don’t mind doing jury duty. I just needed a day off. (More than one but I’ll take what I can.)

The sun is out and we have blue sky for miles. It is still very chilly (46F/7C). I worry about friends and family in Florida. One of our friends that moved back up here lived in Florida for several years. Where he lived is completely underwater according to the news. I am trying to get ahold of my Aunt and Uncle that live down there but no luck. They have several cats and I am pretty sure that they would stay as long as they could.

I am trying to figure out what I want to do today. There are several things that come to mind, but nothing that I have to do. I have both reading and writing on my list. Mom got me a guitar music book. It is pop hits (that she has never heard of, lol). I might pull that and a guitar out. If I do pull out my guitar I might try my hand at the classical stuff again. Classical and Spanish guitar are my favorite to listen to. I also am thinking about taking Stella for a walk at the park. It is a bit chilly but we both need to get out and do something physical.

But I need to wrap this up. I sent a text to my friend who is having issues. I try to check on her every few days. She adores Stella so I send a photo of her and some encouragement. This morning she needs to talk. So I will share some new photos and get this posted. Thank you to everyone for the love and support! It makes more difference than you know. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

anxiety, Automotive, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Tattoos, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Enough Is Enough

I find that I continue to take on more than I should so that people need me. In some situations, it is because I enjoy it (my article writing started out that way). Or to prove to everyone (including myself) that I can do all of it. But there comes a breaking point. Yesterday was that for me. By 9am I just couldn’t do it anymore. Between the brake issues with my car, two meetings on Monday (on the way to the first meeting is when the brake issue started) when Monday was my day off from my main job, the crazy day that was Sunday (being at work by 5:30am to do my liquor order, going home for a few hours after my shift then heading to the tattoo parlor to get my ink fixed), my first inventory where I have to count all my backstock myself for two departments by myself, my plans for teaching cooking classes at work this Fall, my birthday…. too much going on in my head and just as much going on outside of my head. Everything just shut down. My coworkers are awesome and they stepped up to the plate for me so I could go home early. I intended to get my groceries and leave but it turned out that the store owner was in his office as I was heading out. He asked if I was sick so I poured it all out to him. Instead of saying something negative he encouraged be to go home and get some much-needed rest. He also said that I probably was in need of a vacation. I mentioned that Chris wanted to take the week of Memeorial Day off and his response” “Let’s make it happen!” You know you work for a good company when that happens. So I came home with the Boss’s blessing and tried to relax.

I guess this is me trying to step back from things. I need to show someone else how to order cigarettes for when I am gone. As I type this I see the potential issues with doing that. I have to choose someone. There are two people I can choose. Either one would be good. However… the one not chosen will be angry and hurt. GAH! The easiest thing will be to just put it in the lap of my boss. I will give him my choices and let him make the decision. It might be cowardly, but I am close to both of them.

I am thinking of pulling out one of my three classes on dvd and doing that as a relaxation thing. I have creative writing, guitar and photography to choose from. At this point I think the photography is the only one I wouldn’t have to restart. Maybe the creative writing one would be ok. I don’t want to put more on my plate (thus doing the dvd verses going to an actual class class) but I want something that is out of my norm. Something I can focus on that I won’t just drift through because I know it.

I feel a stress headache moving in. It happens when I think too much about too much. So I will wrap this up and try to figure myself out some more. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Musical Heat

It is a hazy morning. Stella is on her back asleep on the couch. It is going to get quite warm here, so we have both ac units going. This is hard for me because I prefer to have the house opened up when the weather is nice. I have some puttering to do outside today so the sliding glass door will probably stay open just enough to let Stella and I in and out.

I got quite a bit done yesterday. I did a little less than half my list but I added a few extras so that is ok. I gave myself a bit of a rest towards the end. It was getting too hot to do much else. But I enjoyed it (I’m weird that way). All the plants got watered, both inside and out. The herbs are going wild. I need to start using them before they get out of control. I have all these grand plans and I can grow like nobody’s business. However, once the plants are grown, I just tend to just let them go. Unless they have fruit or some such but even then, I want to “save” it and will waste it.

I am trying to listen to music while I write this, and it all goes well. And then an ad comes on and throws it all off. I am tempted to do the ad free, but this is the first time in months that I have listened to Pandora. Mostly due to the ads. I don’t listen to music as often as I should. Right now, I have in my ear buds since Chris is asleep. My qualm with that is I like to hear what is going on around me. I prefer to have the music out loud. And then there are my cds that are just sitting there since I have nothing but my car stereo to play them in. I have soundtracks, meditations, dance music and more that I used to write to. I am wondering if the lack of music is one of my stumbling blocks. I know right now I am more relaxed. Even when I look at my list and see what still needs to be done (I admit some of it brings on anxiety just because I do not want to face the specific task).

I also need to write my days off for next week. I just have a meeting next week, so it won’t be too bad. And more ads. I also notice with this particular channel they are repeat the same music. I know these artists have many more albums. And I know that there is more of this style music than they are playing. I think that is another reason why I won’t fork out the money for a subscription. Sorry, but you see what I mean about throwing me off my game? Anyway, I’d better wrap this up and get things started around here. I will do my best to wrap up my list today. A lot of it is just simple printing of documents and such. I can do this…. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Cooking/Baking, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Food, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Motorcycles, Movies, Music, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Good Times Looking Forward

I am listening as a cement truck goes from around the corner from us to a few houses down. I wonder what everyone is doing on their properties. There is so much that we want to do here! From simple to the complex. We get a little started then it tapers off. I am not sure how to fix that. I had planned to tear into my motorcycle engine (the’92, not the 2014) over the summer and there she sits in the garage. I had planned to plant in my raised beds this year. I got two of them partially weeded but no further. Don’t get me wrong, I have done a lot. All the gardens around the house I have kept up on. I have kept all my plants outside watered (since the hoses are wonky, I am using a small watering can). I have lots of peppers growing. Geez. That is the only thing I can think of that I have really kept up with. Well, there is my blog. How disappointing.

On a happy note, the three of us had a great time yesterday. I brought home two big squirt guns for us to play with. I thought it would be something fun and cooling to get us outside. I was right! We had so much fun chasing each other around the yard! After we did that for a while, we played frisbee. It has been a long time since we did that. Stella even played! She liked trying to snag the frisbee. Problem is she tends to chew it once she gets it. As we played Chris was also grilling/smoking us dinner. It turned out awesome! We watched tv and chatted while we ate. We needed that downtime together.

This morning I woke up ready to enjoy my two days off. I am trying to figure out what to do. I keep leaning toward cleaning up my office. There is stuff all over the floor that needs to be moved. But to where… I also need to find room for a bookcase. Mom is giving me one of hers. It is a good sized one that will alleviate some of the piles in the house. I think I have a spot but that means moving things around a bit.

My body is also letting me know that it is not doing well. There are a few aches and pains (my wrist doesn’t want to heal properly for one) and my chest feels like something rather large is sitting on it. So, I will take things as gently as I can, but I still need to get things done. I have videos I need to watch for work (for my certification) and I need to go over the paperwork for the court case. And of course, work on my novel. It is supposed to be very hot today, so we’ll see what happens. I also have a hankering for jazz today. I miss my stereo on days like today. I would just like to put on some of my cds and let the music fill the house. I guess I will see if I can find anything on Pandora. I prefer my cds because I like the music on them versus someone throwing random music at me that I may or may not like but beggars can’t be choosers.

I see that I have gone on extra-long this morning. Sorry about that. I appreciate you listening to me go on. And thank you for your comments as well. It means a lot. Stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Following My Dreams…. Sort Of

This morning has been a bit of a slow roll. I let myself sleep in but when I got up, I attended to laundry, made coffee, cleaned a counter (I was going to do it later but…) and made Stella breakfast. I have been reading your various posts and contemplating class. I really like my teacher, but this class is not what it started out to be. With all the difficulties getting online to our Google group that everyone has had it has been a fiasco trying to learn anything beyond the basics. Everyone is more concerned with why and how to get into the group that they ask all those questions in class instead of ones about writing. Then there are the ones who came into this with no writing knowledge that want a template to write from. I feel as if I am the only one there to improve my writing. Everyone else seems to want to know how to do it. It is frustrating.

Hopefully we have a solution for next week. I will download everything onto a flash drive and bring it. Another classmate will bring his computer that we can hook up to the overhead and read our work from there. I would like a writing group again, but I honestly do not want to drive all the way to Traverse to do it. I might put something up at work. I don’t know. I miss having someone to talk shop with and be accountable to.

Today I need to get all my plants in the ground. I should plant my seeds too. I have been worried because it has gotten really cold at night. But today is the day. I also need to replace my one hose. It will not connect with my old one and not leak. And I need a long hose because my spigot is at the front of the house, and I need to water all my plants at the back.

Mowing the front and back is kind of on the table. Chris wants it done before we are supposed to get rain. There seems to be a slight chance tomorrow but my weather app (The Weather Channel no less) is notoriously wrong. It has been raining and it said it was sunny. No rain predicted (yet other weather apps other people had said there would be) and here we have rain. Or the opposite will happen. But I cannot find one I like. (Oh and my notifications are in Celsius but my app is Fahrenheit.)

I should wrap this up and get out to gardening. And writing. Oh! A smile story! So the other night when I closed the coworker working the gas window and I had been singing with the music (we had a good station on). All of the sudden “Y.M.C.A.” by the Village People comes on and we start doing the dance as we sing just really having fun. I turn around to check that no one is at the gas window needing our attention and I see that all the gas pumps are being used. AND everyone is doing the Y.M.C.A. dance with us! It was awesome! On that smile I will wrap this up. Thank you so much for your support and comments! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Nature’s Wake Up

I have peepers on one side of the house going and birds on the other. The peepers slowly become silent as the sun becomes more prominent in the sky. I am so tired. We were very busy and I had all new people so if I wasn’t ringing I was putting out fires. All being said everyone did pretty well. Ohhhh! I hear a peeper right outside the sliding glass door! ❤️

I have the month of June off from the paper. I am excited about going to class again. Writing and having to have it done as a requirement I think will help me immensely. Pages will be required each week. so I will have to find time somewhere. I don’t know as I am looking forward to my road trips. Driving to Ohio is considerably longer than going to Bay City and staying in state but still. I promised and this will probably be the last time I see my aunt.

Since I have most of the day to myself, once I get home I should put pen to paper. I have tomorrow off (thankfully). If the weather continues to be rainy then I will be out of the gardens and on the page. If the rain lets up I will sneak out and weed like crazy. That wet dirt will make things so much easier!

I need to wrap this up and get out the door. I appreciate all your comments! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

anxiety, Automotive, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, the World, Thinking, Writing

Finding the Good in the Bad

I know there will be some of my readers reading this to hear about some of the drama and trauma of yesterday. I am choosing not to write about that. Instead I am choosing to write about the good that happened.

I have a dear friend that is in recovery. I have done my best to be there for her as much as I can. Last night was one of those times. I asked her to come over as much for me as for her to be honest. I don’t know if the neighbors were happy with us or not (I haven’t heard any complaints so I think we are ok) but that doesn’t matter. We had a blast! We talked and played and danced and sang. When she came over I had a few goodies waiting for her. The big thing that I wanted to give her was a beautiful abalone butterfly necklace. I wanted her to remember that she was an emerging butterfly no matter what. And that she was loved. She’s been through a lot of crap in her life. I wanted her to have something with her that would remind her that she is loved. That she is worthy. She had a good cry over it. I guess no one had ever given her anything nice before.

This morning I hauled my sore and still exhausted tush out of bed and drove over to drop the car off. My mechanic had been up late as well doing an emergency repair on our mail lady’s Jeep. We both looked wiped out. I know I felt the better of both of us. (I just feel so good inside after last night despite the late hour that we stayed up til.) After I finish this I think I will do one of two things. I want to work on my gardens along the front and side of the house. They are looking very scraggly and unloved. The other thing is my novel. I am looking wistfully at my chair and table outside. I should do the gardens first as the temperature is supposed to get extreme again today. I can write in the house or wait til closer to evening if I want to sit outside to write. Ooooo! I can put my swing back out!

So I guess I will wrap this up and get my self outside. I do have some new photos to share (finally!). Tomorrow’s post might be a bit short as it is another 6:30am work day. I want to thank everyone for their support. It means a lot! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Books, Cooking/Baking, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Gardening, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, Tattoos, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Learning and Loving

It is a good sign. The sun is out. It’s not exactly warm but it will have to do. I may take Stella out for a walk on the property, just to get her out of the house. I thought about taking her with for my tattoo but that will be a several hour process and I am pretty sure that she doesn’t want to be stuck in the car for that long.

I am hoping to enhance the final product of the tattooing by telling him that I plan to send a photo to both Kane Hodder as well as the magazine HorrorHound of the finished piece. Fingers crossed! 1:30pm is my appointment. I need to leave a few minutes early to go to an ATM to get the money out. I am both excited and apprehensive. I know that he has but a lot of time and effort into the flash work for this. (Flash work is the drawing the artist makes so you can see what is going to be tattooed on you. Usually this will be a general outline with as little or no detail as the artist chooses. This will also be the stencil that is used on the body for the piece.) And I know that he wants to go as big as he can to get in the detail on Kane’s face. But I just can’t spend $500 on a tattoo right now. That was the price for the size that he had drawn up. I about choked.

There is so much that I want to do and learn! I don’t know where to start! I was looking for a book I had gotten on local rocks (it seems to have grown legs and wandered off) and I see my dvds for photography, writing, yoga… Then there are all the research books I have. Archaeology, learning to write ancient Egyptian, learning Italian, learning Latin, learning French (a refresher for me since I had it in both high school and college, but I am very rusty). And don’t get me started on all the gardening and cooking books and magazines (mostly acquired from Mom)! There is just soooo much! Oh, and sailing. I forgot about that one. And guitar. I have a LOT of guitar stuff from previous classes. But you get the idea. There is so much that I am interested in and want to learn/learn about that I honestly don’t know where to start. Maybe I do. If I write everything on individual slips of paper and put them in a container, I can pull them out at random. Maybe spend a week working on whatever it is then put the slip back in the jar.

Yesterday was Stella’s Gotcha Day. I found her on the side of the road four years ago on that day. Today Essie has been gone 3 months exactly. I look on the table beside the laptop and I see my glass and silver heart box that I got at the resale shop the last time Linda and I were together. Moose’s scarf (that he always tried to shake off) is tied to my leather satchel. Good memories and bad this morning. I’m trying not to get bogged down by the bad. I have plenty to be thankful for and a big future ahead of me. Stella is sitting beside me telling me that there is love and attentions that need to be given at this moment. So I’d better wrap this up. I don’t have any new photos to share but I will share Stella’s Easter photo. I might even send it to Cadbury candy to see if she can be the next Cadbury bunny! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Food, History, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Anniversary and Tattoo

Mother Nature has decided to really mess with us. Yesterday was 50F (10C) and pouring rain. A lot of snow melt and flooding. Then the temperature drops to a low of 21F (6C) last night so everything freezes. However that being said Chris says once you get on the main road to Traverse things are clean. So after this I head to Traverse to do my running before getting inked.

Today is also our anniversary.❤️🥰 I am very lucky to have been blessed with a man as good as Chris. His patience with me these past few months…. well year really. When Moose died is when things started to change inside me. Moosie was my rock when I was alone and freaking out and he was always ready to get his lovins. For all intensive purposes Moose was my emotional support dog. Anyway… Chris has always been there when I needed him and even in times I didn’t know I would. We have had many adventures together and I am looking forward to many more. ❤️😍

I have my little to do list for today. I think I can get it all done. Then I work for two more days and we can celebrate our anniversary together. (His gift is running late so next week sometime. 🙄) I am excited for today but anxious. I don’t want to miss my appointment at 11am. I am pretty sure I gave myself enough time even with the roads. We’ll see. I hope to go to the bank and cash my money order, get canned food for Stella and snag a Happy Meal at McDonald’s on the way back (Stitch from Lilo and Stitch is the toy this month). I think two hours should be enough time for everything. But naturally I will be hyped up the whole time. I might take some of my classical music with me. I miss having a stereo in my office. I would go in there to write (or even stay out here since I could turn up the volume) and play my classical and jazz cds. As much as I love them though it’s just not the same in the car. And my car has the only CD player. Sooooo….

But I do need to wrap this up. I hope everyone has an amazing day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Gardening, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Music, Nature, Photography, retail, Tattoos, the World, Thinking, Writing

Contemplations: Life, Love, Happiness and Banana Chips

Moose’s anniversary started with a beautiful sunrise. Once I got Essie out after eating she did the strangest thing. She was sniffing along the back fence line like she was looking for something. She stopped right at Moose’s grave and just stood and stared. Then she woofed and bounced at his grave like something was there. I thought maybe she saw a deer or something but there was nothing there.

I bought some banana chips to share with Moose today. It was our special treat together. It was one of the few things we could still share together after the got sick. Stella will eat them but Essie mostly won’t. That’s ok.

Essie still hasn’t gone potty that we have seen but we have missed a lot. This morning was a good example. I kept repeating that I needed to watch her while she was outside but I completely forgot because Stella decided that she wasn’t going out so I was trying to convince her to go out when I realized that Essie had been out for a few minutes already. When I got to the door all she was doing was sniffing around. But I will try my best to keep a closer eye on her the rest of the day.

In bed last night I made another to do list. It is all pretty straight forward. Things like work on my novel, make my list of meetings for work for the month (I guess the store manager is going on vacation and making several weeks in advance), work on my guitar, clean out my wooden fountain pen (I really want to like this pen… but it is such a hassle to get the ink to flow enough to write with that it is quickly becoming an expensive paperweight) and take photos (I should be uploading to my web site as well).

I am debating about getting another tattoo. I have several ideas on what I want but I am not sure what to do next. I am leaning toward more butterflies. I want to get local butterflies on random spots. I have my Monarch (I get so many compliments on it!) and I really love the detail work he did on it. Soooo I would like to get that same effect all over. The other one I want is something to do with books. I just can’t come up with a good concept. So I guess I can scour my photos for butterflies and see about getting a few.

Another goal today is to clean out my long window box. It will fit in the kitchen windows so my goal is to get the nasty dirt out from the mess I got from work and fill it with the Miracle Gro that I have. From there I will start some seeds going. It is a sunny set of windows and there is a heater vent near by so it will stay warm. I thought about moving George there (he is my new succulent) but it would be awfully lonely for him. He needs direct sunlight so I have him on the shelves by the sliding glass door. I just worry that it is too cold for him. That being said he is doing fine so far. Sooooo….

Ok I had better stop of now. I am just rambling on. I want to thank everyone one for their kind words over the past week. It means a lot. I hope you all have an amazing day. Thanks for reading and stay safe!