anxiety, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Nature, Reading, Thinking, Writing

Looking Forward and Looking Back

It was just cold and very windy out when we got up. Now it is white out conditions. Bah humbug. What happened to Spring? Ah well… atleast we are done with February!

I do want to thank everyone for their kindness and support over the past few weeks. It means a lot. Moose has been gone almost two months now. And then everything happening after that…

Last night I had all this that I wanted to say on my blog for today but now it is all gone. And I can’t write it then post date it to automatically upload. If I do that then I won’t write anything in the morning. That will throw off my routine. And if I break that part of my routine then I will have to start over. This has been the one constant writing for the past three years. Even if it has only been a line or two to say I wouldn’t be on it was something.

Yesterday I pulled out my copy of Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg. It was my first writing book. It was even signed by the author. Point it I am trying to get back to basics. I am going through the book like I did when I was a beginning writer. And in return it is inspiring me like it did when I was a beginning writer. That was all I did before work with my writing. And I think it was enough for the day. I have tomorrow off so I am hoping to get some novel work done. My meeting isn’t until Thursday night so I am free and clear to write what I want tomorrow. I don’t think I will call my parents. Maybe just texting or email. There was less stress and anxiety Saturday. We’ll see.

I am just looking around my room. Many dreams and memories stored here. A lot of things I need to go through as well. And I think I will start. Sorry this is one of the shorter ones. I’ll add a few pictures to brighten things up. Thanks for reading and thank you again for the support. Stay safe!

anxiety, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Motorcycles, Nature, Photography, Riding, Thinking, Writing

Hocus Pocus I Gotta Find My Focus

This is one of those mornings that my body just aches. I asked Mom if she would mind not going today. Truthfully neither of us can afford a girls day (which is what it would turn into). She just dropped $400 at the vet’s office the other day and I guess her car needs more repairs. I told her she could have what she wanted from the seeds I had gotten for the exchange. So we will try another time to get together.

Lat night I didn’t get much sleep despite the sleep aides. I also had weird dreams when I did sleep. I dreamt of the death of three family members. This was after dreaming of a death night before last. I’m not sure what to make of all the death dreams. I haven’t had them in years.

This morning has dawned cloudy. The sun was out for a bit but a gauze of clouds moved in. Yesterday was beautiful… Everyone was in a good mood too. It was over 40F (4C)! That also helped everyone. A lot of snow got melted between the warmth and the wind. I was eye balling the drive way to see if I could get the motorcycle out if it was nice today. Still a bit thick with snow and ice. But there are shovels around so we’ll see.

I am looking at my list. It is a good list. It is an accurate list. I am hoping it will be a finished list. I already have taken care of two things on there. Most of it is writing. I need to get my head straight with my writing. I am blowing it off and I shouldn’t. That is another reason I wanted to cancel with Mom. I need to stay home and work on my writing. I haven’t done any class work lately either. I need to get my rhythm back. All the emotional drama has got me all over the place. Speaking of which Dad sent a text saying that the only text or email he received was the one he was responding to which was the one asking why he hadn’t responded to anything. I haven’t said anything to him. When I do I will point out the text from me just above that from several days ago asking how he was that got no response. I am trying not to be an ass but I am hurt and frustrated. And I don’t want to talk to him today.

I did get some pretty awesome photos yesterday morning just before dawn. I went out to warm up the car and as I was walking back to the house I happened to see the moon. She was northwest of the house and HUGE! But what made it awesome was that the clouds were flowing over her like she was set in a brook or a river. I went in and grabbed my phone camera and came back and she was gone. I was bummed but I stood out there anyway. After a few minutes the clouds revealed the moon again and I took a bunch of shots as the clouds moved over her. I will share those with you. I am quite pleased with how they turned out.

I should get this online and get writing on my interview and article. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, the World, Thinking, Writing

Roaming and Writing (or Roaming in My Writing)

And another day begins. Essie ate part of her breakfast. That is a huge relief for me because she didn’t eat her dinner last night despite not having had breakfast. We still got to bed late despite my best efforts. Lol. If it wasn’t me “oh just one more!” or “Oh just a few more minutes!” then it was a friend online checking on me to make sure I was doing ok. But that’s ok. I am relaxed and I only have the meeting tonight. Dad has things going today so we won’t be able to chat.

Essie is all up and in my business. Hang on… Ok. She’s outside with her frisbee. Goofball. She wants attention and to play all at the same time. I will work on this as I keep an eye on the door for her.

My personal To Do list has a lot of writing on it. It is getting hard to set aside writing time because everyone it getting the shack nasties (aka cabin fever) from being stuck in the house all the time. We are restless for Spring and being outside on a regular basis. The girls want to play and get attention all the time now. Especially after Chris gets up for the day. I feel guilty for not spending more time with them so I blow off my writing. The hard thing is Essie doesn’t like to go for rides so I can’t really do anything outside of the house for her. Stella loves rides but I feel bad leaving Essie.

Mom and I are going to a Seed Exchange this Saturday. I am going to the Dollar General to get some stationary later and I had hoped to pick up some seeds for planting. I may pick up some extra to exchange. I think it is pushing 40F (4C) here and that is nice for us. The snow is beginning to melt. Essie is still outside wandering (another sign of Spring coming).

Ok, she’s back in. My big goal today is to get caught up on my writing. Last night I wrote my little list of goals for the day. If I can get atleast one of my writing projects done (or continued if I start on my novels) I will be happy. My novels…. I have come to a rolling stop with them. At this point I am doing mostly research for the werewolf novel. Since the bulk of it is set in Italy I am having a hard time seeing the surroundings other than the historical places that everyone goes. I know the history but I don’t know the modern Italy. So I spend time looking at photos etc (which would be fine but I can’t print them because my printer is black and white only). My surfing novel… well, I need to get more into the story and what is supposed to be going on. Or where it is headed. It goes one way and it doesn’t feel right. So I try another way and that doesn’t feel right either. I like my characters. (This is another thing I need to do with my werewolf novel… flesh out my characters more.) One novel I have the story and no characters while the other I have characters but no real story.

I did manage to get some photos taken yesterday. The sun came out for a bit and warmed things up enough to melt more snow. Despite that some areas in our yard are still up to poor Essie’s belly. I watched her break trail out in the far back this morning. Well, I will share some pictures and wrap this up. I would blather on for quite a while so I need to stop and try to harness some of that into an article. Thanks for reading! Stay safe!

Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

Bits and Bobs

It has been snowing for a few hours now. Bah humbug. I have been reading more blogs this morning than normal (since I finally have my weekend off) and now my coffee is cold. Lol. We slept in til almost 8:30am. I spent a few minutes lounging in bed loving on the girls. I dreamt about Moose last night. I won some kind of coin operated game and got three balls for him to play with. He was a happy boy. The girls were there too.

I finally got photos of the knives I got Chris. I’ll share them on this post. I also got a refund for my shipping from Amazon since the one knife was late. I thought that was a pretty decent thing to do. It showed up the next day and the delay probably wasn’t their fault but I appreciate the gesture.

My one article is set to go live on March 1st. I still have my interview and two reviews to do. I think the interview will be a cut and paste from our exchanges. I started reading the short story collection that she helped put together. It’s very good abut I’m sure it’s not for everyone. In fact I think most of the people I know would put it down in short order. Just because it is very graphic. It deals with body horror. I am enjoying it because it is something new for me. Like I said the writing is very good.

I need to make sure we are out the door and headed to Pearl’s by 3:30pm today. I am rather excited. This will be the second time we’ve eaten out since this whole thing started last year. Speaking of which… I had to check to see if the restaurant that Mom and I went to for her birthday would be open. Looks like we are good to go. We just need to make a reservation.

I have been monkeying with my camera to no avail. I am trying to get the frame rate slowed enough that you can see the snow falling. Right now with both the Nikon and my phone if I take a photo when it is raining or snowing you don’t see the rain or the snow. And the photos I got this morning would’ve been beautiful if I could’ve frozen the snowfall (pardon the pun). Oh ho! It looks as if the sun is trying to come out!

Well geez. Essie is all up in my business! I got up to take a few photos (with both the Nikon and the phone) and she heard the shutter clicks and thought I was done in here for now. So I guess I’d better stop here so I can add the various photos and thus go spend time with her. Lol. Thanks for reading! Thanks for caring! Stay safe!

Animals, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Love, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Being an Example

I have been doing so much this week that I have just set myself an alarm to make sure that I am not late for work. Essie is upset with me too. I just stepped out of my office to do something and she came running up to get love and play. Then she kind of looked at me. I told her I still had to do this and write my article. She looked at me one more time then went back to the couch and laid down. I was two hours late coming home last night because someone called in. I figured it was easier for me to stay than for them to find someone to work a few hours. Don’t laugh but I had Chris tell the girls that I would be home late. I know they can read the clocks and know what time to look for me.

Now I don’t know which way is up. I have another long day today which is going to be longer now that I see work has done a 10% off your grocery order today. We will probably be busy. But I have tomorrow off. And tomorrow I HAVE to write the book review and article for my online editor. I blew it off Wednesday to talk to Dad. Too many writing projects due at once. If I can get them written early then I can use the rest of the day to play with the girls and spend time with Chris.

I don’t have any meetings next week but (depending on how I am scheduled) I will be working straight through til next weekend. Wednesday is our anniversary (30 years if you can believe it!) but we are going to celebrate next weekend. The schedule will be out either today or tomorrow. I also need to spend some time on my classes. The frustrating thing is that the problems I am having with my photography will be addressed in my classwork. The same for my writing (oh and I do need to make more of an effort for my novel, it thinks that I don’t love it anymore). Sigh.

Next week should be easier even if I am working. I can pace myself to get writing done in the morning and late at night before bed. Classwork I can do after work when I work mornings. I just need to stay focused. On that note I do need to write the article for the paper and get that sent in. Thanks for reading and stay safe! And thank you for all the wonderful comments!

Animals, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

Free Time

Aahhhh…. Sleep! Essie let me sleep until almost 8am. My only plans today are to write the final drafts of 2 articles and a book review then get them submitted. I have to remember to get yesterday’s meeting written up. I am so happy with having a day off I am worried I will forget both that and tonight’s meeting. I have an alarm set for tonight’s meeting.

It looks as thought the sun might stay out this morning. I tried to get some of the beautiful colors in the sky with the sun rise. I find it interesting that I can get more of the color using my phone’s camera than I can with the Nikon. The colors looked very blah or nonexistent. (Hint: if I watch another of my class videos I might find out what to do to fix this. Sigh.) But the sun is trying to peek out.

This post is taking longer than normal. Apparently the girls really missed me. I get one or both of them in here demanding attention every few minutes. I threw Essie’s frisbee outside for her. Stella as even up in my lap giving me kisses and hugs. Both got good scratches and belly rubs before I got out of bed this morning. Did I mention that is it good to be home?

I am looking around my office as I type this and my eyes fall on my Stephen King shelf (he actually has two, one for my hardbacks and one for my paperbacks). It has been awhile since I read (or reread) his work. But I need to finish reading my review book (I may be dragging my feet on that one because the stories are short enough for me to read on my 15 minute breaks at work and as I’m falling asleep at night). Buuuuuut that hasn’t stopped me before. Lol. Maybe I’ll pull out one of his novels later.

I feel as though I’ve shared nothing constructive. What do you like to do in your free time? Is there anything that you find relaxing or comforting that you would recommend? Feel free to share your thoughts and ideas in the comment section! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Tattoos, the World, Thinking, Writing

Going a Little Cray Cray

I am experiencing one of those weeks where you have so much going on that you really have to take things day by day because you really aren’t sure what day it is thus what you have to do that day. This upcoming week is going to be beyond crazy. Three meetings (Monday night, Tuesday morning and Wednesday night), one article and one book review due, I have to set up training for work (we are getting a whole new system) and all that on top of my work schedule (I’ve never been trained for some of the stuff I am doing at work this week and I am going to be on my own so it will be interesting). This doesn’t include any class work, exercising or working on the novel.

I got Moose’s tattoo yesterday and I am beyond happy with it! No this did not hurt and even when it was done it just felt like a sunburn. Now I can’t even feel it. The piece is not only true to life in the way it looks but also the size. I guess my tattoo artist was surprised that I showed up yesterday. All his other appointments had cancelled due to weather. I told him a) the tattoo meant too much for me to not do it and b) I only lived down the street so I could’ve walked if needed.

I didn’t go to bed until late late last night and my brain had me up at 7:30am. I had all this great stuff I was going to talk about and share but it is all gone like wisps in the wind. My damn “n” button has something wrong with it. Half the time you push it and you have to push it again or go back and put it in because the key didn’t register the pressure. Grrr….

I did get some amazing photos (there goes that stupid “n” key) yesterday. I had to force myself to put my camera down so I wouldn’t be late for my appointment. Lol. Which reminds me I need to watch the next class on my photography course. And my writing one too. But I need to one thing at a time. (Sorry, I just paused there to get pictures of a new type of bird at the feeder.) The problem is I only have a little bit of time to get things done so I am trying to cram. And there is so much to do my days off don’t feel like days off. Just a day that I can cram more stuff that I have to do into. Sigh. How did my days get so full all the sudden?

I should wrap this up so I can share the photos with you all. I am pretty pleased with some of them! Thanks for reading and your support! Stay safe!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Exercise, family, Learning, Life, Photography, Thinking, Writing

Getting It Done

Last night I didn’t sleep well. Or rather I would have if Stella hadn’t done her every little while barking routine. She did it about 3 times. Each time I was in a deep sleep. So now I am paying for it. On the plus side I did get a lot done last night after work. I got my workout in (and some extra routines as well), I talked to Mom, I got 2 videos for class watched and I got an appointment tomorrow morning at 8am to get new tires for Angus my Subaru. I have Thursday off and a meeting that night so I am hoping to sleep in. I can Friday as well but since I am getting my tattoo I don’t know if I will be able to sleep the night before.

I got a few photographs last night and one this morning (misty clouds going over the moon got a cool rainbow effect). I’ll share some of those with you. I switched up my class and I started my creative fiction course. It is intense enough that I feel like I am back in college. There is something like 36 lessons to it so information defiantly isn’t going to be crammed. I plan to go back and forth between the writing class and photography class. When I finish one of them I will add one of the other two waiting in the wings (guitar or creative nonfiction).

Truthfully I feel miserable this morning and would call in if I could. But I can’t so I just hope the day goes fast and well. I’m going to wrap this up and add some pictures. Thanks for reading. I hope everyone is well. Stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Motorcycles, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

So Many Choices aka Where Do I Start

This morning we slept in. Mostly. I was wide awake at 4:30am for no reason. But within a few minutes Stella had darted off the bed so I followed suit. Just in time to get her outside to throw up. But I got myself back to sleep by 5:30am the the girls wanted to get up just before 8am. Funny thing is I stayed up past 10pm last night despite being wiped out doing reading and research.

Have you ever had so much around you that you wanted to do and/or learn that you didn’t know where to start? That is very much me right now. I have two novels that I am writing and researching (the werewolf story seems to be getting the most attention right now), I got three more classes that I want to do (learning guitar, creative writing and creative nonfiction) as well as the photography class. Let’s not forget the photography class that I’m already doing and the new magazines that I got in the mail the other day. Oh and the abundance of potential photographs that seem to be jumping out at me. Then I also need to keep the girls and I active which means exercise routine for me and lost of chasing, tea kettle and toy throwing for them. And let’s not forget my all important family time. When did my life get so complicated? Lol.

This morning I took a bit longer in reading other writer’s blogs. I am making an effort to try to make more comments on blogs (I know that I like to hear from my readers so it’s only fair). And there were a lot that I was drawn to comment on. Keep up the good work everyone!

Nuts. Hang on. I’m out of coffee.

Ok, I’m back. I also had to give Essie a belly rub. Anyway, there is just so much to do! I’m not even sure where to start. I have the research that is ongoing for the werewolf novel as well as my resources from my personal library to help write it (the current reference I am using is Robert J. Ray’s The Weekend Novelist. I figure if I can just work on it my two days off a week (I am fully aware that I am going to probably doing something related to the novel every day because that’s just me) this book will give me help in staying focused. I hope. I have the article that I need to research and write today. I need to do my exercises. Dad wants to chat. I need to call Mom to see how her date went the other day (the first one in almost 30 years… I am very proud of her, it took a lot for her to go out). I need to watch atleast one more class in my photography course. I have narrowed down my tire search for my Subie but I keep forgetting to call around locally. And everyone is closed today. I also need to get the motorcycle hooked up to the trickle charger (it has been bitterly cold lately so I have put it off). And apparently I need to see to the bird feeder. The chickadees are getting very vocal when they see me. On that note dear friends I suppose that I should wrap this up. I have a few good photos I will share with you (oh and I need to get some more photos uploaded onto my online shop). Thanks for reading and as always stay safe!

Ed. Note: This is my 800th blog! Yay!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Exercise, family, Learning, Life, Motorcycles, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Sleep, But Not Enough

I am sorry this is so late. I had an alarm set for 7am but I just couldn’t do it. I have been so tired in the mornings regardless of when I go to bed. This morning it was just overwhelming. I got up before my alarm and just turned it off. I close tonight and have to be back at work at 6am tomorrow so I’ll need to get a bunch of pictures taken before work. Right now it is snowing hard.

I did get a lot done yesterday. I did my exercise routine, mailed out my car payment, played a little with the girls before work, got my article submitted, did research on tires for the Subie. Then after work I watched one of my videos for class, read the next chapter in the accompanying book, showered, played some more with the girls, worked on my novel, read more research for same novel and did some journaling.

Yesterday I took pictures mostly with my phone. I couldn’t get the lighting right with the camera and the pictures of the girls the phone was right there. If I’d gotten up to get the camera the moment would’ve been lost. So the photos I plan to share today are all from the camera on my phone.

As I reread my post am I doing too much? I don’t know. Maybe I need to find a happy medium. I think my original plan was to watch my videos for class on non exercise days since I am supposed to do that every other day. But I wanted to make sure that I kept up with both. I am trying to make sure that I don’t become too lazy. I know if I give myself free rein then I will end up getting nothing done.

Chris got me a trickle charger for the motorcycle. This keeps just enough juice going in the battery so that I can leave it in the bike instead of pulling it out for the winter. I need to get that installed. It has been bitterly cold out so I have been putting it off. Saturday I will have the whole day so I think that would be a good time to do it. I also need to take back bottles and cans. Well bottles. And I may do that today. If I load up Angus when I go start him to warm him up I can open the back and then load him up. If I leave a few minutes early then I can roll them in and get my money before work. Everything is beginning to build up in the corner we keep bottles and cans (we couldn’t return them for months and now it is just a habit of not returning them). So I think that will be the plan.

I am going to wrap this up. Again I am sorry for this being so late. I know I missed a lot of my early morning readers today. On the plus side I definitely won’t tomorrow! Thanks for reading and stay safe!