Aging, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, History, Learning, Life, Nature, the World, Thinking

What We Can Learn

This morning is the opposite of yesterday. As bright as it was the shadows today are darker. The sky looks cold and about to cry. Essie doesn’t feel well this morning. She didn’t eat breakfast and has been outside several times. Moose and Stella are curled up in the pile of blankets on the couch. I need to pull out two of those blankets to go in my car, Angus, soon. Moose needs to go to the vet this morning to get further tests on his kidney disease. His medicine should arrive today as well. Lol. I just let Essie back in and she made a beeline for the couch and is currently looking for a spot to lay with her siblings.

As I was watching and chatting with customers it struck me that all the “old” people were once young and all the young people will (possibly) become old. I listen to the stories of the older folks and laugh with them at the antics they got away with when they were younger. Then there are the older ones that flirt shamelessly cheeky monkeys that they are. They all have stories to tell. They have lived adventures we never can, survived things that we can’t understand. To ignore them is a shame on us. No matter how old they still have things to teach us.

And the young do too. They can teach us how to live life instead of worry about every little thing (although the pandemic is making a lot of them grow up and worry too soon). Thy remind us that we have imaginations that can take us anywhere, we just need to follow our hearts.

I guess the point is that we can still learn from each other. If we make the effort. Stay safe and thanks for reading.

Emotions, Friends, Learning, Life, Love, Thinking

Open the Door or Keep It Locked?

This morning I awakened to a dilemma. I received a friend request from a friend… well an ex friend I guess. We were really close for a few years (too close sometimes) and we had a big falling out. Blocked phone numbers and the whole deal. It hurt because I really did care about the person but the drama that started! That was what finally got to me. Funnily enough I was not the one that ended the friendship. He was. And while I missed him I did not miss the drama. I think about him and hope he is doing well. This morning I look at my phone and there is a friend request from him. After a few years he wants to be part of my life again. SO the big question is do I let him back in? I don’t know what to expect. If I thought he had matured some and wasn’t going to blow my phone up at all hours I might consider it. But I just don’t know. And truthfully I have been content not to have the drama.

I guess looking at it the answer should be pretty straight forward. There seem to be more negative possibilities than positive. But he was a good friend and I do miss him. So. I worry that I will create unwanted drama if I let him back in. Things for the most part are going pretty damn well. I am getting my head in a good place and I am content with how things are. Isn’t that when things like this happen? When you get too comfortable then something pops into your life to “spice” it up? I don’t want… I don’t want to do the same thing over again.

When I went to bed I had planned on telling you about my peridot pendant I got for myself and the new book but that kind of fell by the wayside. Ok. I did it. Fingers crossed.

Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Creativity, Emotions, Holiday, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, the World, Thinking, Writing

Working On Writing

It feels strange to not have the over head light on as I write. Not only is it daylight but the sun is actually out. So much is going through my head this morning. There are things I need to do and then there are things I have to do. The have to do stuff requires me to put my big girl pants on. And we all know how I feel about dragging those on! All kidding aside it is serious enough that I’m… not worried so much as I don’t want to hear that I am right in this instance. (I am purposely being vague, sorry.) As to the need to do I have an article to write. I get frustrated sometimes because I feel like I am working in a vacuum. Outside of the paper I get no real feedback on my writing when I send it out. They either like it or they don’t and request changes or find a polite way to say no to the piece. I have no writing group to turn to anymore to throw out suggestions and tell me when something isn’t working right on the page. I miss that.

I need that give and take as a writer. I’m not sure what to do about it. There is nothing locally and I’m not sure I want to try to set something up in Traverse City with winter coming on. Well that won’t work either way regardless. COVID has everyone either concerned or angry it seems. It would be fun to have a monthly Zoom meeting and everyone either email a few pages before said meeting or just read it out loud at the meeting. But finding the writers and a time that works for everyone (depending on the size of the group)…. that could be difficult. Especially with the holidays coming up.

I have a web site I could try to set things up on but everyone is from all over the world and not necessarily consistent. I would like a group of the same people to meet not just a rotation of fellow writers. I want to get a feel for someone’s writing and watch them grow. Not try to gauge if this or that comment will set someone off or if this is what they really meant when they wrote that. So I just don’t know.

Oof…. I just realized how late this post is! Sorry about that! I’m a few hours behind. Which reminds me that I need to get going on my article as well. I will try to get some new photos to share for tomorrow. I did get a few of this morning’s sunrise. Not great but I loved how the sun was gradually lighting things up. Thanks for reading and as always stay safe!

Animals, Books, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Guitar, History, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Reading, Thinking, Writing

Lost In the Bread Crumbs

The promised wind from the past few days seems to have arrived today. Winnie the Pooh would refer to it as a “rather blustery day.” My relocated bird feeder is still holding strong wedged on the branch of the maple tree. The clouds are moving around swiftly so we’ll see how that affects the weather. The ponds are icing over.

There is so much that I want to read and research and learn. I’m not sure where to start so I peck at everything like a chicken. A little here and a little there. Usually not the same subject each peck. Which limits my learning because that peck might be a book but if I don’t finish reading the book and start another that has caught my attention…. which is what I tend to do. There are research books I bought a year ago that I still haven’t finished reading. I have beginner guitar music and lessons, learning Italian, keeping up with my French, all my varied history books and biographies…. all been read a little but never finished.

I am watching Moose and hoping he is dreaming. He has been my shadow since we went to bed last night. I don’t think he feels good. When he was outside eating some of the small bit of snow we got parts of his body started shaking. I thought he was cold but then I noticed that it was just random places he was shaking. Not all over like he was cold. He is doing it again now but I can possibly contribute it to dreaming. Right? Some of the muscle shakes do not coincide with his dreaming. I may be reading too much into this but there it is.

I feel scattered. So much I want to do, things that need to be done, things that should be done. All seemingly to be done now. What to do? How to chose? I try to calm my mind and pick one thing off the important list and try to do that. Then maybe something off the list just below that. Some days this works. Other days panic sets in and I give myself a stress headache and do nothing but berate myself because I’m getting nothing done.

I can say that the birds have found the feeder in it’s new spot. I am glad. When I find a replacement I will try to hang it from one of the branches of the maple trees. I got a few photos of birds at the feeder (just outside my window yay!). One is a woodpecker (red head) and the other is a chickadee (tiny one). A lot of chickadees but there is one little blue bird trying to defend from all comers. Let me see if I can get a picture… I got a few shots that I will share. I’m gonna need to get that other bird feeder asap with the battles that are going on out there. Sheesh!

I’m going to upload the photos and try to get one thing off my have-to-do list. I don’t work until 2pm so that will give me some time. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography, Thinking, Writing

Cloudy With A Chance of…. ???

This morning is cloud but comfortable. I still have a meeting to cover this morning but last night’s was cancelled. For that I am grateful. I was so very very tired. It was nice to get to get a decent night’s sleep (Stella started barking pretty much from 2am until Chris got home). Despite good sleep I have a headache that has been starting….. I just had to retype the last two sentences. As I was typing the next one I couldn’t figure out what the typo was. Then I really looked and two sentences had disappeared. ??? I hope that I am not getting a strong case of my murphyionic field kicking in (electronics and I do not really get along, I have crashed computers at various jobs as well as at home just by being in the room…. no joke). The registers at the courtesy counter and gas window were acting up yesterday. The main machine was adding things to orders that were not there without the benefit of me touching any buttons as well as freezing up. It is 2020 so this could add unwanted energy to this “power” so watch out! Lol

I did try to work on my novel at work yesterday morning. I got a few ideas down as well as some suggestions for myself (don’t try to write a linear story right now, just write scenes and piece them together later) but things got crazy at work so I stashed my little notebook. I just want to stay home today. Preferably to sleep to be honest but just to chill out. My head is starting to pound. I know part of it is the weather. We are supposed to get rain later today. Another part is probably stress. I’m not quite sure what to do.

I am also trying to rack my brain (creatively) to come up with new shots. If I am going to take photos in the same area I need to start getting a little more interesting with the shots. No more point and shoot kind of thing. The dogs will be for it. Whenever I pick up the camera the dogs are like “Sweeeet! we’re going outside!” So I need to start looking at things in new ways. I am glad that I have the two lenses to chose from. That makes things a little funner.

I see by the clock I need to start getting ready to go. I don’t have to be to work until 2pm so I am hoping that I can get the article written before work. Thanks for reading and as always stay safe!

Being Pagan, family, Friends, Holiday, Learning, Life, Nature, the World, Thinking

And Then the Day Was Here 😱

Well today is the day! Halloween is finally here! It’s both a happy and sad occasion. Especially if you are a Pagan. For us it is a time that we can show our respects to those that have passed and start moving toward new things. On Halloween (or Samhain) it is easier to hear those that have passed before us. Many Pagans will do a small ritual to give thanks to loved ones for help and protection they have given over the past year (this is our New Year as well), much like the Mexican Dia de Muertos or Day of the Dead. I guess it is a day to wrap up the old year and look forward to the new.

I hesitated about writing about my faith as many of my followers believe in different things… many believe that my faith is wrong and bad. When I write about my beliefs I feel exposed and I don’t like the feeling but I want to share the knowledge. I’m not trying convert anyone. I am explaining what things mean to me and others that share my faith. I want people to try to see that there is room in the world for more than one kind of belief system. I do my best to respect others faith. I would like the same for mine.

Today has dawned sunny but cold. I think it is the cold snap that will drop all the leaves. The wind isn’t too strong but it is enough that the leaves are falling constantly as it blows. The maple trees behind the house might even be bare by the end of the night (which is fitting on Halloween!).

Tomorrow starts November. We are almost at the end of the calendar year. And Winter is on the way. I had a gentleman gas up yesterday morning who said he had moved here from Louisiana just to see snow. There was a bit falling (he had asked if it was snow and I tried not to give the well duh look, I’m glad I didn’t) and it was bitter cold out. He then said, “This is as cold as it will get right?” I’m afraid my eyes did give things away this time. “Oh no! We usually get down into the negative numbers. This is only the beginning.” His face fell. I could tell he was rethinking his move up here. I didn’t have the heart to tell him it was probably gonna be a very very cold winter this year regardless of how much snow we got.

I think I am going outside for a bit to enjoy the sun while we have it. It has been so dark lately. It is welcome change. Thanks for reading! Stay safe!

Cooking/Baking, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Nature

Sorting Through

What a mess yesterday’s blog turned out to be! It said I posted it in the morning on the laptop without photos. But on my phone app it said that nothing had posted… despite 8 views. So when I got home I monkeyed with it some more on the phone app and apparently it officially posted last night. Sigh… Oh and I have to delete a lot more photos than I want to share. For example, I deleted about 12 photos but it only let me add two to the post last night.

I am dropping my Jeep off some time today. It was supposed to be earlier this morning but I slept until 9am (don’t be too impressed, I was in and out of the bathroom til late and then I was wide awake from 6:30am til 7:30am). Hang on… that was my mechanic. I don’t have to drop the Jeep of til around 2pm. Yay! I had hoped to take back a batch of bottles before I dropped off the Jeep.

The sky looked so hopeful when we got up. Clouds but a lot of blue sky poking through. Then our great blazing maple trees just outside the door. It’s like having a clump of sunbeams just hanging out. Sometimes the yellow is almost too bright to look at. But right now it has darkened enough that I had to turn on the office light.

I am happy to say that I really don’t have anything that I have to do today. I cleaned so well for company (and we have been able to keep it up) last week that there is nothing to do around the house. I might double check the plants for watering. I watered everyone the other day but it has been so cold and the furnace has been on so much that the house is really dry. Some of the plants are ok with that but others need to be watered more than once a week. I also need to get more information on my orchid. I can’t tell when or if she needs more water (she gets ice cubes verses liquid water).

One of my coworkers in the deli is learning to cook. We are both excited about it. I have been giving him little hacks and I am bringing him my ever popular bread recipe from my Winnie the Pooh cookbook. He’s very smart and enjoys cooking so it is fun to share stuff like that. We had a lot of fun last night with all of us. I seem to be fitting in really well.

Despite how cold it is out the air smells really good. Like when you got outside on a Spring day and the sun is out and you can smell the earth, flowers just Nature. It made me feel good. I think I will wrap this up and try to take back some bottles (we get 10 cents for every bottle we return so that is a HUGE help for groceries and such). Thank you for reaching out and commenting! As always thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Exercise, Learning, Life, Motorcycles, Nature, Thinking, Writing

Looking Ahead

The winter doldrums are a knockin’. The leaves are falling off the trees faster and faster with all the wind and the colder temperatures. There is so much to do inside but it usually requires you to be in one place (playing games, reading, etc) and I am one of those who wants to be outside. Just not in snow and cold weather. I also need to keep the kids active. So I guess I could design a workout routine of sorts. They do like to play tug of war a lot and catch (not fetch because they want to actually catch the toy, not chase it and bring it back). I’m sure that with some thought I can come up with something to keep us busy atleast for a little bit every day.

With October winding down and November looming before me I am staring NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) in the face. I got myself this year’s tee shirt since I am participating. I’m not gonna lie, I am a bit anxious about this. It is such a huge undertaking. Essentially writing a complete novel in a month. I feel more confident about it than previous years because my job is not long hours that I use up all my energy (especially my creative energy) so when the time comes I have nothing to write. I also have two stories to chose from this time and I have a good background for both. But the question still remains… can I do it? You can preorder a tee shirt that says you finished NaNoWriMo successfully. I am tempted to do it. But if I fall short? Will that be a reminder of a failure? Or will I let myself off the hook and let it remind me that I won regardless because I made the effort? I would like to think that with the improvement of my mental health I would take the positive outlook. But you never know with me.

Work is slowing down considerably. Part of me is grateful but then the other part gets bored. And that means I don’t have to wash everything down as often. My hands are so dried out and hurt from the constant washing of my surroundings as well as the hands themselves. They are starting to crack and bleed. I need to find something that will help. The other gals at work are always putting lotion on but they aren’t always waiting on customers. They might be stocking, facing the shelves of doing work in the offices. When they put the lotion on it will stay for awhile.

Every time I hear the furnace click on I find myself getting anxious. Over the past few years I’ve worried about various things being stuck outside in the weather because we had no place to store them out of the elements. Usually it has been the motorcycles. But this year all four of them are tucked safely in the garage. I can go out and see them etc (this reminds me I need to put my bike on the charger to make sure I have juice in the battery incase I need to ride to work (no he never came to get the Jeep, some medical appointments have put things off until later this week) because the Jeep hasn’t wanted to start). It is weird not having anything to worry about. I try to make sure I notice why I am worried and then tell myself that I don’t have to have that habit anymore. Because that is what it is at this point a habit.

I guess I should wrap this up for now. I found some visitors outside the kitchen windows this morning. The bunnies are getting bold. I tapped on the window and they just looked at me. Before they would take off. Well thanks for reading and all the lovely comments! Stay safe!

Animals, Creativity, Dogs, family, Friends, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Nature, Photography

Finding Room to Breathe

This morning has been a reversal of routines. Before even turning on the computer I have taken care of the dogs, watered the plants and picked up a little bit. Once the computer was on I checked my classes to see if I had a grade for the final course yet. (Nothing yet.) The kids have been in and out since around 6am. The girls have upset tummies. I have been in the same boat off and on since 5am. I’m not feeling the greatest but I don’t have the heart to cancel. I talked to our friend last night and both he and his girlfriend have been really looking forward to this movie night. So I will hope to feel better by tonight. That is the other bit. They won’t get here until around 6pm. They work nights so they usually get home around the time everyone is getting up. I have to work tomorrow at 11am so I’m not sure how late I will be up tonight.

It is another dark morning with rain and snow mixed. That started about the time I was getting up because I didn’t feel good. Some of the snow remains but most of it has been melted by all the rain. I had a mostly empty gallon bucket on the porch. In one day it has gotten to overflowing with all the rain we’ve had.

Speaking of buckets I got both the mum plants transplanted the other day. They are both very happy right now. I also cut off the bottom half of the root ball. Poor plants had very little dirt beneath them. To show their happiness both plants are blooming like crazy. ❤️ The tomato plant seems to be doing better since I removed the basil plant from the planter. There is more room for both the tomato plant and the pepper plants.

I can’t believe that my violet plant is still blooming! It has been in constant bloom since I brought it home a few years (?!) ago. I have been diligent about dead heading when needed (I also did that when I repotted the mums) as well as making sure it stays watered. All of my plants are doing tremendously well. I can’t wait to get the one shelving unit out of the kitchen and into the garage so I can spread out the plants (I am thinking another shelving unit that fits in the corner possibly). Then we can use the kitchen table again. I also want to move Calypso (our ball python) into that area of the kitchen. It will be much warmer for her there. Right now she is close to the sliding glass door and gets all the cold air when it is opened.

My Jeep will be picked up either today or tomorrow. I am anxious. I want the Jeep fixed but I want my car to drive. I love my Jeep. It will be so nice to just drive and not have to worry about if I will make it.

I suppose I should wrap this up and finish up the last minute cleaning. There isn’t much. Just the living room tables and the stove top. I will probably sweep the kitchen one more time. Ooop and dishes need to be caught up. But not a lot so I think it will be fairly easy. I will try to take some pics from tonight’s event for tomorrow’s post. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Creativity, Dogs, Learning, Life, Nature, Writing

Like a Leaf in the Wind

I am sitting in my office as I type this with a Pibble on my foot. Aaaand here comes another one. Stella came in here and curled up at my feet. Essie is wandering in and out. Moose is asleep in the man cave. He snuck in there while Essie was still outside (she is the one that usually sleeps there in the morning). Essie doesn’t know where to go with her spot taken over.

It is way too early and I’ve had way too little sleep. I have about 15 minutes to get this done and get ready to go to work. I got a lot done yesterday before work. My classwork (my last piece for the whole thing) has been handed in and I have done my reviews. Dishes got done and I made a list of what needs to be done before Saturday. I feel stupid though. I thought I had a meeting tonight but I don’t it is next Tuesday. For some reason I had it in my mind that it was the third Tuesday not the fourth. Ah well. I have also picked up another meeting to cover for the paper. I really really hope I can put off the Capstone part of the course (you only get access to this if you pass all the classes) until after November. But if I can’t then I can’t. It will be a wild ride of writing!

Ok, I need to get going. Sorry this is so short. I don’t have many photos to add since I wasn’t able to take any yesterday. The leaves are beginning to fall of the trees now. The cold is setting in in earnest. Everyone be safe and thanks for reading!