Aging, Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, Reading, the World, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Love In A Snow Storm

We awoke to several inches of snow. Within 45 minutes the flakes had gone from coarse salt size to the size of a nickel. Then it went in the opposite direction. It is in the process of getting larger right now. Essie spent a good amount of time patrolling the fence line. Mostly at the back and she began and ended her patrols at Moose’s grave.

I called the vet yesterday morning. Essie has an appointment at 2pm. Since she hasn’t done anything but pee it will be x-rays right out of the gate. We are worried about a blockage. I am glad I saved my Christmas money. So I guess Essie and I will leave a little early and get that money deposited. I’m pretty sure it will all go toward her vet bill. I just hope and pray that I don’t have to make “that” decision. That scares me to death.

I didn’t get much done yesterday. I did water plants and do laundry (although the last load is in the dryer still). The girls and I went out to Moose’s grave for a bit and shared some banana chips with him. It was chilly enough I put coats on the girls since we were going to be out for a while. They had a good romp.

I got a surprise Christmas gift from Chris yesterday that helped to cheer me up. A little bit ago he purchased himself a light saber. He really enjoyed it and was doing his forms again (one of the things I always loved was watching him work through his sword forms). But apparently he wants someone to play with (these are ones that you can connect with but not full contact if you see what I mean). I have a thing for rooting for the bad guys a lot and that was the case when it came to Darth Maul in the new Star Wars movies (which I am not a big fan of, I prefer to stop at the first three… which technically are not the first in the story 🙄). So that is what I have. Darth Maul’s double saber. This set up has all kinds of bells and whistles that I have to figure out (volume being a big one… those things are loud when they talk to you!) but there are things like various sounds you can make (right now they sound like a traditional light saber when I move them through the air and I can make it sound like I am repelling laser gun fire) as well as being able to change the saber colors (I have gone with my favorite of red on both). So that will give me something to play with. It is quite large and heavy when both sabers are together but that will just strengthen my wrists. I think a lot of time will be spent outside once it starts to warm up (I will actually be able to get him out of his office! lol). And that is not a bad thing for either of us.

But my thoughts keep coming back to Essie. I am trying to plan things out in my head so I am not making decisions on emotion only on the spur of the moment. As much as it hurts I am trying to think things out. I want her to leave this world at home. She is terrified of going to the vet. And with the new restrictions in place I don’t think I would be let in and I am NOT leaving her alone with that. So I guess I would set something up to have them come out to the house. The next question is what are we going to do with the body? I would prefer to bury her out back with Moose but the ground is frozen solid. I don’t know if we can right now. I hate to send her away to be cremated. That will require some more thought.

I am sorry to be thinking out loud on this. My fingers are typing what is going on in my head without much filter this morning. My heart is feeling so brittle right now. One blow and it could shatter. I find myself looking at my Winnie-the-Pooh bracelet that I got myself. It says You are Braver than you believe-Stronger than you seem and Smarter than you think. I am not feeling any of that at the moment. (For those of you wondering where in the world that is in Winnie-the-Pooh it is what Pooh tells Piglet when Piglet’s house is flooding and he is freaking out (this is in the original books mind you, Pooh gives him a similar speech in the Disney movie). Pooh may have been a bear of very little brain but he sure was a smart one. ❤️ Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Books, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, the World, Thinking, Writing

Looking Through the Dark

Here we are. Another post in the dark. I have both girls out here with me. I guess this is the new routine. I feel bad not sitting with Stella on the love seat because Essie is on the couch and her tummy is gurgling so I am worried.

Today I don’t have any responsibilities today. That being said I might see if I can squeak out early. The coverage will be there. If we are dead like yesterday I may. I miss the family. Everyone at work understands why I am suddenly quiet and out of sorts.

I came home last night and pretty much went straight to bed after feeding the girls. I asked Chris not to feed them before I got home as I wanted to give Essie some more pumpkin to help with her issues. I did read for a bit and Chris would come in and talk about things while he played with the girls. Despite it all I had a hard time getting to sleep. I am hoping tonight will be different. Part of it is me only seeing the dark when I leave for work and come home. It has thrown my internal clack off. I am like the dogs so when it gets dark I start to get sleepy. I am not a fan of the dark all the time. The constantly overcast days are bad enough.

I read all your posts and everyone is so positive and looking forward to new things in the new year. Here I am struggling just to make it through the first week. No pictures again so I will see if I can get some repeats. Thanks for reading and all your kind comments. Stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Dogs, Emotions, family, Holiday, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, retail, Thinking, Writing

New Year?

I had planned on staying up til midnight then just hopping in bed but my heart wasn’t in it. Essie hadn’t been well most of the day. So I decided to curl up in bed and read. At the appropriate time I took my medicine and turned out the light. Everytime I’d fall asleep something would wake me up. Then it would take me an hour or longer to fall back asleep only to have something else wake me up. I was able to sleep solid from around 6:15am until my reset alarm went off at 7am.

I have no idea what the day will hold. Essie did eat breakfast. Both girls are out here with me in the living room as I write this on my phone. I am the only manager today since we are only open 9-6. This will also be my first bout with using the alarm system.

I really don’t want to go to work. I would like to sleep. Depending on how Essie is over the next few days I may or may not be taking her to the vet on Tuesday. I hope not because I won’t cope well on that day.

I didn’t get any photos taken between Essie and talking to Dad. So this might be an all text post. I need to see what is on the Nikon. Thanks for reading and stay safe.

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Food, Guitar, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, the World, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Quality Fun With My Man

Everything feels off this morning. I am worried about Essie as her tummy is upset again. We may be going to the vet to start the new year. Yay. All she wants is to be loved on by me. I can hear her tummy across the room even over the furnace. If I lose her now… I can’t even cope.

Yesterday was an amazing afternoon with my Hubby! We ended up downtown Traverse (after several frustrating loops to find parking) and wandered a bit. It was a bit more wandering than we had intended. L’Amical was closed. So was the next restaurant. The one after that was short staffed so there was not one bussing the tables when they became empty. After a bit of waiting and no one asking if we needed to be seated we left. There were a few other choices along the way but none sounded good. So we ended up a Mackinaw Brewing for brunch. As always the food was excellent. The server even more so. Sadly I could not taste the flavors of either of our beers (I know it was me because Chris was able to pick out flavors used in the brewing process). To me they both tasted like water. Instead I decided (much to my happiness and giggles) to have a glass of “Sex”. That I could taste. (“Sex” is the name of a locally made champagne. Their other products have equally fun names.) The server and laughed together about me having “Sex” in public while Chris looked on wishing the moment would end, lol.

After brunch we made our way to the blessed bookstore. Sigh… I love our local bookstore! I got us both some much needed caffeine (double cappuccino with an extra shot of espresso for me and a large chai for Chris) (I had a good chat with a guy who worked on the local tall ship Madeline) and made my way through the store. The first thing I grab when I walk in the door is a copy of Michael J. Fox’s No Time Like The Future. This has been on my wish list for a bit. All three of his books. This happens to be the latest release. By the time we leave I have two books and a magazine (annoyingly I think I may already have a copy of the magazine). Chris got to motorcycle magazines (I will thumb through those when he is finished 😁).

From the bookstore we head to the local music shop. Chris needs a strap for his acoustic guitar and I figure I might as well get new strings for mine. We look through the strap selection and gasp a bit at the prices of the ones we like. Chris meanders a bit through the store ooing and ahhing over all the toys. While he is distracted I grab the strap that we both kinda liked and get that and my strings. When he comes back to pick out one of the cheapy straps I tell him to put it back and take his bag. He reaches for the cheapy strap again and I again tell him to put it down and take his bag. Then the penny drops (the guy that waited on me is behind the counter grinning the whole time). He looks in the bag and I get a big hug and thank you.

The next stop (this time we are on the road home) is Meijer’s. I end up leaving with the cutest little succulent! His name is George. After the quick run in that store we get a little closer to home and stop at Tractor Supply to get more canned food for the girls. While there I try on jeans (I can’t find a good fit even in mens sizes) and boots (I just want a plain basic cowboy boot… nothing fancy, no pointed toes or short boots). Nothing I want. A gal suggests that I try online and get it delivered to the store (I am thinking why not get it delivered to my house and save me the trip?) since they have a larger selection online. I agree and we depart with the canned dog food (Momma got a toy for each of the girls at Meijers so I was able to not go down the toy aisles there).

When we finally made it home I fed the girls (after we played for awhile with our new toys) and hunkered in bed for some serious reading. I am still reading two other books (one of which is a loaner from a friend and I need to really give it back soon) buuuuut I had to start the one by Michael J. Fox. As of right now I only have 78 more pages to go. Out of 238 pages. Ahem. Did I mention that I really wanted this book?

So we’ll hopefully all get some rest today. I will probably finish the one book and maaaaybe start another. I will write a review on the book when I am finished reading it. I am hoping to share some of the photos I took while we were out and about. I’m not sure how many I will be able to do as I took them with my phone which means they will take up more space in my media on here than my Nikon (I can download those as a smaller size). So we’ll see. I hope all of you have the best 2022 that you deserve! Thanks for all the love and support this year! Thanks for reading and stay safe! See you next year!

Animals, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, Reading, the World, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Enjoying the Beauty and Simplicity

Essie is upset because she saw me stretch before beginning this and had hoped that meant that I was done. She and her sister are curled up on the couch together. I did get her to finally eat about midday. Oh now she has gotten some love and is curled up behind me on the love seat. Goofball. And now she is going to lay in front of the bedroom door. Busy puppy. 🙄

Not much got done that was planned but that is ok. It was a good day and that is all that matters. I love the books Chris got me. He got me a three-book collection of Coraline, The Graveyard Book and “Fortunately, The Milk by Neil Gaiman as well as The Wander’s Guide To Dragon Keeping by an author I found here on WordPress Ashley O’Melia. We got a beautiful small handmade olive oil pot and small but very tasty bottle of espresso liquor (both made in Israel) from Chris Mom and Stepdad. For the occasion I pulled out the hand-blown liquor glasses that my parents brought back from Italy for my Grandma (Dad’s Mom). And I set them out on a little tablecloth that my Grams (Mom’s Mom) embroidered.

Mom and I had a good long chat trying to figure out when was a good time to get together after the first of the year. She has several appointments the first two weeks so we might put it off til the end of January. We’ll see. I have to show her how to get on Amazon and look at the lists. (Yes I sent her a link but she is having some issues with things so it will just be easier if I am there to see what is wrong instead of her trying to explain it over the phone.)

This morning is quiet and dark. We did get some sun yesterday which the girls and I took advantage of. When I opened the door to let them out this morning even the ever-present roosters were silent. It was as if everything had stopped for a moment. I just stood there in the doorway and listened. Then Essie reminded me that I needed to make them breakfast.

I find myself getting lost in the quiet. I kept the door open for a little bit despite the cold outside (still no snow) because I just wanted to feel it. During the summer months that door is wide open as often as I can. The girls can go in and out and I can just sit and stare while sitting on the porch. I miss feeling the breeze on my face during the winter months. And with no snow then it doesn’t feel like it is winter so …..

I got a few photos over the course of the day that I will share. The really cool one was the eagle that flew overhead. I am not sure how good the shot will be as I did not have the right lens on (I was out there to get pictures of the blue sky and clouds). Hopefully I can get it blown up and keep the photo looking clean. We’ll see! I should probably wrap this one up and get my day started. I hope everyone has an amazing day! Thank you for all the well wishes yesterday! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Riding, the World, Thinking, Writing

It Looks A Lot Like… Anything But Christmas

Merry Christmas to those that celebrate it! The morning is grey and dark but there is no snow! So we have grey, brown and green as our color palate for today. And I am ok with that. There are no plans other than just hanging out and doing whatever. Chris and I will exchange our books later today. Since he wants digital copies of everything I am just going to have him pick them out and I will buy them right on his device (purchasing digital copies for someone else on your device is a pain in the tush). The girls have a big box of treats to choose from although I don’t think that Essie will eat any. She’s not feeling good again. Stella got sick in the wee hours this morning. I about broke my neck trying to get across the bedroom and get her out the door (gem that she is she was already at the door trying not to get sick in the house). But Stella ate breakfast whereas Essie did not.

Work was either busy or dead no in-between. We closed at 6pm but I have no idea how late they ended up staying open. Sometimes it is difficult to stem the flow of the last-minute shoppers. I got some lovely chocolate treats from one of my regulars and then another yummy chocolate raspberry champagne truffle bar from a coworker. I will be snacking on those later today!

Since I have two days in a row off I will be able to make more of an effort toward various goals I have for myself. I will just divide up the tasks over both days instead of trying to cram it all into one day. Today I will go through my media on here and atleast clear out enough to get a few photos posted on today’s blog. I think I might also watch some of my educational DVDs. Oh yeah, we are going to pull out our acoustic guitars at one point so we can learn “Everlong” by the FooFighters. I LOVE the acoustic version and I asked Chris if he would teach me (I thought he knew it already). Surprise! He doesn’t know it but he wants to learn it together. This will be the first time we have played together. I have to admit that I am a bit intimidated. He is a much better player than I am. He will pick it up quickly whereas I will plod along trying to get the fingering and strumming right. I have forgotten so much from class!

I think I will try to call both of my parents today. It will just be a question of when. I can’t tell you how excited I am over no snow today! I know that a lot of people are disappointed… but I am not one of them. In all honesty we could even go out for a Christmas ride on the bikes…. we’ll see. Maybe we can slate that for tomorrow. Ok, I am going to clean out my media to make room for some photos I want to share with you. I hope you all have an amazing day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

anxiety, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Holiday, Learning, Life, Medical, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Word Wrangling

I feel like I am in a rush this morning. I was asked to come in to work early. I wanted to say no but I know that the store manager isn’t feeling too good. He was still there when I left and he got there before I did. And I am now wearing my coffee. Atleast I didn’t get any on the laptop. Yesterday was a day. I was hoping that today would be better. I guess we will see.

The internet is officially back. I was wondering since we had strong winds last night whether or not it would still be up. Whereas I am grateful to have the keyboard to type on I feel like I spend too much time on my laptop. I don’t really. This is all I do on my laptop unless I need to write an article. And this is the first time in what? five days that I have used it.

The morning is gloomy. Grey skies and no snow. What we had is gone. Again. It’s like this weird cycle. It’s still cold but half of us like the no snow thing and the other half want snow. (Us being the local community.) Despite happy dreams my mood is grey as well. I received my current issues of Poets & Writers as well as The Writer yesterday. I saved them both for bed as a treat. There were several articles that resonated strongly with me. And a lot of introspection went into my journaling last night. That on top of the hard day at work (we lost four of our eight gas pumps on top of being busy and trying to calm angry customers) I feel a bit wrung out. But I just need to get through tonight and a shift tomorrow and I have a day off. I do work Christmas Eve but I am morning manager so that will be a bit easier I think than closing. Too many last minute shoppers that don’t realize that we close at 6pm that day. But that will be someone else’s worry.

I have decided to keep going with this blog. I need to get into my photos and delete what I can so I am able to start sharing more. With the early work day I won’t have time today or tomorrow. Hopefully Thursday. I am going to try to tweak my format a well. Maybe a different theme each day instead of a type of journaling. Similar to the “Taco Tuesday” that restaurants have. Maybe something like “Monday Musings” or some such. I am leaning toward “Reviewing Wednesdays” since that will keep me reading different books.

I had better wrap this up. I still have emails to go through from the past five days. It looks like it is pushing almost 2,000 emails. I hope to make a dent in it before work. Opinions and suggestions welcome. Thanks for reading and for your support! Stay safe!

Animals, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Friends, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Another Sleepless Night

I truly don’t know how today is gonna go. Or tomorrow for that matter. No sleep at all last night. Not even a few minutes. And I have a meeting tonight as well as tomorrow morning. I still have to write the article for the Christmas party from yesterday. That shouldn’t be a big deal. However trying to squeeze in both the articles for the meetings for this week might be a problem. As it turned out my last meeting of the month got changed from the 28th to tomorrow night. I am not going to be able to attend as I have to work. I have let my editor know so we’ll see what she says.

Essie has been in and out of the bedroom this morning. Both girls did get up with me and eat. Both also went outside after eating. I was in bed last night with an upset stomach. Once it calmed down I thought I would be able to get some sleep. Nope. I finally turned off the light a little after midnight. I proceeded to toss and turn the rest of the night away. I even took Wellbutrin but it didn’t do anything.

I got a few photos yesterday and caught up with some friends. I kept getting weird looks as I was wandering around with my camera. I think I have some useable shots. I will add them to the article before I email it in. My goal is to get it written before tonight’s meeting. Then I will determine whether or not to write the article for the meeting tonight or get up early tomorrow and write it. I don’t think that I will have my last article done before work tomorrow. Once the meeting ends I will have to haul butt home to get ready for work. Which means I will need to shower tonight. I won’t have time otherwise. I also will need to do laundry tonight after I get home to make sure that I have clothes to wear. The big thing is going to be trying to get some sleep. Right now I am wide awake despite the yawning.

I will have Thursday and Friday off this week. So I just need to make it a few more days. I tried to get a hold of Dad yesterday but no joy. Mom wasn’t very responsive either. She started sending text messages after I had gone to bed. Sorry this is kind of all over the place. I feel scattered. I will wrap this up and start getting ready for work. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, Books, Cooking/Baking, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Holiday, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

And Then There Was None

Well my friends, this morning is not the brightest for us. None of us wants to be up. We are all tremendously tired. Essie won’t eat again. She is snoring in front of the bedroom door. She did not come out with me this morning when I got up. I actually had to call her. Stella came right out when she heard me making breakfast.

I am exhausted. I spent all my energy yesterday. Day 5 of 7. So here I am on day 6 and facing a 10 hour day. There are things that need to be done around here but I just sit and stare outside with no motivation. It is simple things like warm water for the turtle’s bath, water my plants, grab cookie cutters for a friend at work. Simple and easy things. This morning is the complete opposite of yesterday.

I just covered Stella up (she is behind me curled up in a tight little ball) and she let out a big sigh. I’m pretty sure that if I opened up the bedroom door, we would all crawl back into bed. I did finish reading my mystery last night. But then I also read Art Matters by Neil Gaiman (illustrated beautifully by Chris Riddell). And I thumbed through Find Your Joy by Jennifer King Lindley. Writing this makes me thing that I need to get on Goodreads and update my reading list. I like the fact that I can just scan the cover with my phone and it will pull up the title. That makes it so much easier.

No photographs were taken yesterday since once I finished with my review (yay! I finally did it!) Chris was up and I had to hop into the shower and get ready for work. (I had a slight pause there. It dawned on me that the person I did the review for might want to know that I did the review so I sent a link.) I might try to get a few photos to add to this. I just have no energy.

I hope you have an amazing day! Thank you so much for reading and letting me know what you think! Stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, the World, Thinking, Travel, Writing

(Don’t) Let It Snow… Wait, Too Late

Today is a hibernate day. Since we got up the now has started falling again. As the minutes wear on it gets thicker and thicker. I guess it’s pretty if you like that kind of thing. But when you have to drive in it… I am just grateful that I work only a few minutes away. I wonder how busy we will be tonight.

I slept about 11 hours last night. I was in bed by dark and didn’t make it much past 9pm. Stella needed out a few minutes to 8am so I just stayed up. We’ll see how my voice is today. It was going out by the time I got home with all the talking. Word had gotten out that I was back so everyone was stopping by.

Not a whole lot of traffic this morning. I wondered how the church goers would react. I guess a lot of the churches run their services online so that makes it easier on days like today. I wonder if the plow trucks will be out. They never came out when we had that freeze and ice was all over. Last year they would’ve been out by now. That doesn’t bode well for the rest of the season.

We have a music battle going on at work. Normally Christmas music doesn’t start until December 1st rolls around. This year it started right after Thanksgiving. All of us (with the exception of the store manager who feels about Christmas like I do about Halloween… celebrate it all year) are over it. So when he walks out the door for the day the music gets changed. We’ll be able to that for a few more days atleast.

Hmmm, we are under a winter weather advisory. 2-6 inches (5-15cm) over the course of the day. We got several inches yesterday. Gonna be a thick Winter I think. I might actually have to get some boots to wear.

Chris seems to have bounced back rather well from being sick. Unfortunately I seem to either still be sick or have caught a cold. I am still coughing, I sound like I have a cold when I talk, my nose is still running and it is still difficult to breathe. We’ll see how the week goes I guess. I have Tuesday and Wednesday off. I have a meeting one day and a doctor’s appointment the next. I think I am going to call off the doctor’s appointment since it is just for my prescriptions for my back. I have barely touched them while I have been off so I have plenty if I need them. And truthfully since I’m not feeling quite up to snuff I would like to use the time off and not do much. I have been wearing my masks while I am out and about so I can still do that for the meeting.

I took a few photos yesterday when I got home but I will take a few more to compare our snowfall. I hope you all have a great day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!