Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Thinking, Writing

Guess Who’s Taking Classes…

Today’s big news is that I signed up for an online class.  Actually classes.  It’s a creative writing collection of courses through Coursera.  I am paying for them so I will get a certification at the end.  Chris didn’t seem too enthused when I told him.  He thought I would go for a photography class.  I don’t think he sees the use in me taking this course since I already know how to write stories.  His second guess when I said I was taking writing classes was journalism.  He knows I can earn money doing that so that would be normal to guess.  But creative writing seems like a waste to him.  Mind you he’s said none of this.  This is all what I am reading into his response.  I didn’t mention that I was paying for the courses.  (You can take all the courses on there for free but you won’t get certified and you might not be able to access everything available in the course.)

I am taking the classes because I am hoping that talking with other creative writers I can get more consistent with my writing.  And I am stuck in my novel so I am hoping that I can use that over the course exercises and get that back on track.  I already have ideas after the first class.  It started yesterday.  I have done everything but write the 250-350 word story and critique others.  I cranked out a rough draft last night before bed (one of the reasons I didn’t get to bed until almost 1am) and I hope to tweak it today and get it submitted.  The twist for it is that they have listed 12 random words and you need to use atleast 6 of them in every other sentence to create movement.  I got a bug after watched a bunch of diverse short documentaries last night.

So that is where I am right now.  This morning I feel a bit run down.  I felt like this last night so not sure if it is merely the continual heat or just me coming down with something.  I think I will wrap this up and go read or work on some writing.  Oh and they are letting me finish the guitar class if I want to (I was almost done before I stopped… maybe one or two hours of work left I think) so I guess I’d better tune the guitars back up and get at it.

Thanks so much for reading and thank you for your thoughtful comments!  Stay safe and have a great day!

Emotions, Guitar, Learning, Life, retail, Thinking, Writing

Making My Inner Life a Better Place

   I want to write.  But what to write?  I thought seriously about doing a biography but that seems to be out of reach.  There is almost too much information about my subject… and I have access to very little.  Then I thought about doing a book on depression using two of my favorite celebrities as subjects.  But that might hit a bit close to home.  And again the subject matter is daunting.

   I can’t seem to write much fiction anymore.  My imagination just won’t work for me on paper.  I don’t know why.  I will have flashes but blip! and it disappears.  I miss fiction.  I am still passionate about reading it but I can’t seem to write it.  That was one thing that spurred me to learn guitar (again).  I hoped that another creative process would help loosen the choke hold on my fiction writing from whatever inner demon had it captive.  I just don’t know.

  Speaking of guitar I did practice yesterday morning for a few hours.  Much to the dogs chagrin.   They all wanted me to do anything but that.  I would get frustrated with them and my lack of prowess with the guitar.  But I made myself stick with it and I was actually able to see progress after I was done.  So I’m glad I pushed my way through.  I have just one more week of class then I’m on my own.  I hope that I will have enough to start learning songs but I think I will have to try some of the apps I have for tuning and such to learn a bit more.

   I am in comfort mode due to the weather.  I don’t know whereas warmer weather would get me any further.  I would just prefer to putter around the house and the yard then.  Maybe I will make an effort in another way for my writing.  I have all these wonderful ideas to get myself writing again but never follow through.  So I guess it is time to follow through.  I need to atleast try.  I will start small and go from there.  Maybe I can work up to writing a book.

It’s funny how stepping away from all the stress of my old job has let go.  Sadly it has still done lasting damage that I am still working through.  But I feel I am a better person inside and out.  I am atleast trying to live my life on my own terms instead of scrambling for corporate needs at the cost of my own life.  I gave up so much inside and out.  It’s the inside damage that I am still struggling with.  Thus my writing and learning to play guitar.  I’m trying to fix what got broken.

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Emotions, Guitar, Learning, Life

Not Playing My Tune

I got to bed late because I am struggling with learning guitar.  Just to wake up to find out that someone has tried to hack my email account.  So I spent the first 20 minutes or so trying to verify my email and get my password changed.  I need to practice more with my guitar but trying to learn to read music and learn to play is difficult for me.  I was getting more and more frustrated as I went along.  It didn’t help that I was having problems with the quiz and every time I got one wrong (which was A LOT) the note asked if I needed to go back to review the lesson in week 5.  Week 5?  This was supposed to be a week 4 quiz?!  After not passing for like the 5th or 6th time I gave up on it.  I sent a message to the forum about it.

As a result I am loath to pick up my guitar to practice.  I feel too frustrated and overwhelmed with the whole thing.  I had planned to try again this morning after I finish this and go to but I am dragging my feet.  I even rewatched all the videos from week 4 to try to get things straight in my head.  How did Mom do this?  I want to badly to learn to play but I am ready to throw it all in at this point.  And I don’t feel good practicing around Chris because he is so good.  It’s all me not him.  He will give pointers if I ask but he is so much better than I and that adds to the frustration.  He doesn’t read music but he can teach himself a song by listening to it.  He has learned classical pieces as well as more modern ones.  He taught himself “Little Wing” by Stevie Ray Vaughn as well as Tesla’s “Love Song” (to name a few).  Yes I know he spent hours upon hours when he was a kid practicing.  That doesn’t help me now.

The snow feels non stop as well.  Plow trucks were going through last night as late as 11pm last night.  They haven’t done that in a few years.  They were back at it early today as well.  I was going to try to head into town to do some running but I don’t know whereas I want to be out in this mess.  I could wait til tomorrow if need be.  I just don’t want to not take the kids (my dogs) because I know they are going a bit stir crazy like me.  Although we did run to the store yesterday.  Maybe I will chance it. Then I can stay home tomorrow.  We’ll see.  I won’t go anywhere til Chris gets up anyway.

Thanks for listening.  I suppose I’d better go and practice my guitar.  I can do this….

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