Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Slow But Focused

This morning I am in a bit better headspace. I hope the day goes well. I think I will be busy today as my liquor order should be waiting for me. With the locks changed I don’t know as anyone else will make the effort. I could be wrong. We shall see.

I still haven’t gotten my car in about my brakes. No answer from my mechanic yesterday. I can limp the car to and from work but more than that and I have to borrow Chris’s truck. Poor Stella has not been for a walk all week.

I did my best to try to relax yesterday. I did notice my anxiety still kicking in. I don’t think my mind will do a shut down like Tuesday. I don’t know what everyone will say either. Speaking of which I need to get myself together and head out the door for work. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

anxiety, Automotive, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Tattoos, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Enough Is Enough

I find that I continue to take on more than I should so that people need me. In some situations, it is because I enjoy it (my article writing started out that way). Or to prove to everyone (including myself) that I can do all of it. But there comes a breaking point. Yesterday was that for me. By 9am I just couldn’t do it anymore. Between the brake issues with my car, two meetings on Monday (on the way to the first meeting is when the brake issue started) when Monday was my day off from my main job, the crazy day that was Sunday (being at work by 5:30am to do my liquor order, going home for a few hours after my shift then heading to the tattoo parlor to get my ink fixed), my first inventory where I have to count all my backstock myself for two departments by myself, my plans for teaching cooking classes at work this Fall, my birthday…. too much going on in my head and just as much going on outside of my head. Everything just shut down. My coworkers are awesome and they stepped up to the plate for me so I could go home early. I intended to get my groceries and leave but it turned out that the store owner was in his office as I was heading out. He asked if I was sick so I poured it all out to him. Instead of saying something negative he encouraged be to go home and get some much-needed rest. He also said that I probably was in need of a vacation. I mentioned that Chris wanted to take the week of Memeorial Day off and his response” “Let’s make it happen!” You know you work for a good company when that happens. So I came home with the Boss’s blessing and tried to relax.

I guess this is me trying to step back from things. I need to show someone else how to order cigarettes for when I am gone. As I type this I see the potential issues with doing that. I have to choose someone. There are two people I can choose. Either one would be good. However… the one not chosen will be angry and hurt. GAH! The easiest thing will be to just put it in the lap of my boss. I will give him my choices and let him make the decision. It might be cowardly, but I am close to both of them.

I am thinking of pulling out one of my three classes on dvd and doing that as a relaxation thing. I have creative writing, guitar and photography to choose from. At this point I think the photography is the only one I wouldn’t have to restart. Maybe the creative writing one would be ok. I don’t want to put more on my plate (thus doing the dvd verses going to an actual class class) but I want something that is out of my norm. Something I can focus on that I won’t just drift through because I know it.

I feel a stress headache moving in. It happens when I think too much about too much. So I will wrap this up and try to figure myself out some more. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

anxiety, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing


I slept in hard today. Dreams, dreams, dreams all night. I feel very thick headed. My goal is to be to work by 10am which means I will need to cut this a bit short. I have a lot to do. When I get home tonight I hope to work on the novel. Even if it is while I am in bed. I have ideas that are swirling around in my head that I need to write down. Today is a day I would like to spend the morning working on my novel. But I don’t want to be at work all night so I need to get in earlier.

My meeting was changed to next Thursday. The gal that called said that it was on their web site but I kept getting an error message when I tried to go there. Oh well, atleast I found out before I got there. That makes next week a busy week for me. And that is ok. It will keep my mind off things. I have to remember that I have a wedding on the 20th! So I know that it will be one of my days off. So much going on this month!

Ok, I need to wrap this up if I am going to work by 10am. Sorry it is so short and a bit scattered. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, the World, Thinking, Writing

Storms? Inside and Out

Well that was a bit wet! I woke up to a lightening strike notification on my phone. Concerned I checked my weather app (The Weather Channel”. No chance of rain and nothing on radar. I go about my morning routine. I see more lightening. Thinking it must be heat lightening I stick my head outside. Nope. It is distinctly chilly out. Stella gets up and eats. I hear soft rumbles in the distance. As she finishes eating I notice things are getting a bit louder and brighter outside. Fortunately she got outside and did her business before it all broke loose! Within a few minutes the skies opened up and it just poured down, accompanied by the song and dance of thunder and lightening. It lasted around 10 minutes but everything got a good soaking. The brief storm seems to be moving off to the north west, flashing as it goes.

Yesterday was not my best at work. Things were crazy and we were short staffed. I found out that a coworker is going through a bad separation. She is leaving an abusive relationship. So I am doing my best to make things as easy as possible for her. She is now staying an hour away at a safe house so she needs to work less hours as a result. Stuff like this makes me realize how lucky I am to have Chris. There is so much wrong going on out there.

I can’t believe it is almost August! The Summer has just flown by!😳 Before I know it we will be knee deep into Fall. Which means the big 5 oh is only 2 and 1/2 weeks away. I think I will ask to work morning shift if they are going to have me work on my birthday. It’s on a Tuesday this year so nothing exciting will happen the day of. We’ll see. I have a wedding that Saturday so I’m not sure what our game plan is.

Oops! I need to get moving. It is almost time for me to head out the door. Thanks fir reading! Stay safe!

anxiety, Creativity, Emotions, family, Friends, Learning, Life, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Quickity Quick

Today’s post will be very quick. The additions and the “fixes” to the phone app have got things a bit messed up this morning so reading your posts for a bit complicated. But I am glad I did.

Part of the sunrise is a rich orange going into a deep bruised purple. The colors are soooo pretty! But neither of my cameras pick up the colors correctly. The orange has changed to a rosy pink now.

Yesterday went well for the most part. I got some more information about what goes on with my beer department. My tiny liquor order went out on the floor and my cigarette order got put away. I stayed as long as I dared. I was feeling worse as my shift went on and I was getting crabby. It was difficult to be nice. Everyone felt overly needy which got on my nerves.

I hope I do well today. I am floor manager but I also need to fill both liquor and beer (it has been very hot here so we are going through a lot of both). Coughing is the norm here at home right now. I hope I can keep it under control at work.

The clock says I need to wrap this up. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Working and Working

This morning I am very scattered. I really wish I could stay home. I don’t feel good. The plus side is that I am making my own hours today. I hope that my order comes in today early. I was going to say I had my cigarettes too but if I am not there the ladies take care of it for me so no big deal there. I concentrated on the beer cave yesterday since it had been all but wiped out the two days I was gone. I met a few of my vendors as well. I am very excited to try new things in both my liquor and beer departments.

Thankfully I just remembered that I had to put my work clothes in the dryer. I had them washed last night. Both my focus and routine are off. I guess my phone will not charge in the new case (my phone charges on one of those charging pads… or should). I found this out when I woke up this morning. My phone was at 1%. Fortunately, I have a plug-in charger that has me up to 75% already. I also had several messages waiting for me when I got up. So, once I had my phone charging, I had to respond to those. Those messages turned in to conversations. All before my first cup of coffee! After that I just tried to remember what I needed to get done. Laundry was one of them and I forgot completely until just now.

Chris stayed home from work yesterday. He was supposed to work today too but the way he feels he will probably stay home. I am tempted but there are things that need to get done at work. Even if I just fill in on my liquor wall and in the beer cave. I was melting hot when I got up but now, I cannot get warm. Stella is out here on the couch sleeping on her back.

Ok, I am going to wrap this up and get this posted. I haven’t had a chance to get more photos so these will all be repeats. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, family, Food, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

A Stormy Sleepless Night

No one has gotten much sleep. I hope colds are all we have. Even with the humidifier our throats have become dry and started the tickle that makes you cough no matter how hard you try not to. Then at 4:54am a storm rolled through scaring Stella. She finally settled down around 6am. Right now she is laying in the sand where the deck used to be.

I am frustrated because there is so much that I need to do before work. It’s not much and there is enough time to get things done but my mind is in a panic. So I am just trying to go with the flow and not worry.

We need to replace the mower engine. It has shot its bolt. Literally. There is a hole in the side wall of the engine. Fortunately, I know someone that is willing to give us a replacement engine. I put he and Chris together so they can hash out the particulars. What type of engine specifics, when to look at, where to meet etc. I hope it works since it would be cheaper to use gas to go get a free engine than spend several hundred for a new one.

The rain that fell this morning is already gone. Then sand had small pits in it from the rain but everything else is dry already. I am debating about watering my plants. And I have no Monarch caterpillars this year. All the milkweed and not a single caterpillar. I’ve only seen maybe three Monarchs in the gardens as it is. That makes me sad. Only two hummingbirds have shown up despite the feeder and the flowers. My blue banana tree is all but dead. I don’t know what to do for it. I give it the special food every week like I am supposed to. I have tried all versions of sunlight and none of it makes a difference. I have tried adding some sand to the potting soil thinking that maybe it need better drainage. Nothing helped.

I close tonight and then back at 6:30am the next few mornings. I will be able to spend time with Chris this weekend so that will be good. I’d better wrap this up if I am going to get everything done that I need to. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

One More Shift

It is now so weird for things to be this dark when I get up. I had gotten used to being up as the sun was coming up. Now my early mornings are dark. Stella was up long enough to eat and go outside. Then she went right back to bed.

I am looking forward to relaxing this afternoon. I am hoping to get my liquor order in before I have to go home so I can get out at a decent time. I also need to work on the beer cave. I haven’t really worked in it for a few days. It’s only been carry outs stocking it.

After work yesterday I went to a birthday party for a friend/coworker. Her birthday was actually the 4th. She turned 18. It was awkward as I did really know anyone but I missed her graduation so I promised I wouldn’t miss her birthday. Funny thing is her present arrived last night,late. I woke up to a message on my phone that my package had been delivered. Chris said some of my birthday stuff had been delivered when I was gone (he floated actually, lol, as he was very pleased with himself😊) but I wondered if my package was one of those. So I wandered out to the mailbox and lo! There it was. So I am excited because we work together today so I can give them to her today instead of later in the week.

With the emotional roller coaster I have been on this week it will be nice to have the next two days off. I have no meetings this week so I want to try to find a rhythm at work with my new positions. I seem to focus more on liquor since I am the only one who stocks it on a daily basis. I leave beer to the carry outs but truly I need to stock it myself a few days a week.

I see by the clock that I need to wrap this up. I don’t have any new photos so these will be some repeats. Hopefully I can get fresh ones to share tomorrow. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, Emotions, Friends, Gardening, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing


I am on the love seat with the resident cuddle bug. She got up a few minutes after me and has been by my side ever since.

This morning’s post will be brief since I gave myself an extra half hour to sleep. Ayer work I need to remember that I am going to a birthday party. I will just want to stay home but I can’t. I promised.

Work has been going fairly smoothly. The only issues have been with the coworker that is stepping up to shift manager. She hasn’t been talking to anyone. She and buttes heads hard while I was setting up my display. I essentially told her she needed to quit telling me how to do my task. She didn’t like that anymore than I did her telling me what to do. So everyone has been getting the cold shoulder.

I need to wrap this up. I do have new photos to share. I think I have time to upload a few. Have a great day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

A Quick Blip

This will have to be a quick one. Not only am I running late (I got to set my own schedule today ha ha ha) but the battery saver mode just came on my laptop. I was up when Chris got home this morning from work. While I was still at work, I got several messages asking what my shift was. So, when I got home, I had a wonderful girl’s night with a friend. She had a rough day and I was privileged to be the one she decompressed with. We had an awesome time together. Lots of plans were made and lots of fun was had.

Stella is up with me. She hasn’t eaten but she did take her glucosamine chewables. I need to wrap this up and get myself together for work. I hope you have an amazing day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!