Aging, Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Friends, Gardening, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Music, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Writing

Release!

I didn’t get out of bed until 10am this morning. Mind you I didn’t get to bed til after 1am, but still, I slept in for once. I still feel like I could sleep for a few days it feels good to have slept in. When I called last night to find out about jury duty I was so relieved to hear that it had been cancelled. I don’t mind doing jury duty. I just needed a day off. (More than one but I’ll take what I can.)

The sun is out and we have blue sky for miles. It is still very chilly (46F/7C). I worry about friends and family in Florida. One of our friends that moved back up here lived in Florida for several years. Where he lived is completely underwater according to the news. I am trying to get ahold of my Aunt and Uncle that live down there but no luck. They have several cats and I am pretty sure that they would stay as long as they could.

I am trying to figure out what I want to do today. There are several things that come to mind, but nothing that I have to do. I have both reading and writing on my list. Mom got me a guitar music book. It is pop hits (that she has never heard of, lol). I might pull that and a guitar out. If I do pull out my guitar I might try my hand at the classical stuff again. Classical and Spanish guitar are my favorite to listen to. I also am thinking about taking Stella for a walk at the park. It is a bit chilly but we both need to get out and do something physical.

But I need to wrap this up. I sent a text to my friend who is having issues. I try to check on her every few days. She adores Stella so I send a photo of her and some encouragement. This morning she needs to talk. So I will share some new photos and get this posted. Thank you to everyone for the love and support! It makes more difference than you know. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Friends, Gardening, Holiday, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, the World, Thinking, Writing

The Big 5-0

Somehow, I managed to make it 50 years. I have done so much… Yet it feels as though not much time has gone by. This year is kinda special because everyone is going out of their way for my birthday, family and friends alike. I have decided to call this the “Fabulous 50s”, not nifty 50s.

Stella has been in my lap almost since she has gotten up. She is on a bland diet so see if that will help. She is also on a cancellation list so if someone cancels and she is still not doing well I can get her in. They are booked solid til September. I know she’s not doing well. But I will try to keep her happy til we can get into the doctor.

Yesterday we went to the Secretary of State and got my tabs. I was pleasantly surprised to get in and out within 5 minutes. I did not know if I would be made to wait because I had no appointment. I walked in and up to the counter and did my thing. So both the car and motorcycle have their new tabs. I called the vet’s office while we were in the parking lot in case they could get her in. Since they couldn’t we went to the park for a walk. She has strained her left shoulder, so we took it slow. I’m not sure what she did. It seems to come and go. I am trying to be positive but a Momma knows. She is doing a lot of the same things Moosie did after he was diagnosed with kidney disease.

I have people stopping by throughout the day to say hi. Mom wants to get together so I hope she would consider coming out here. I don’t know when everyone is stopping by. Dad wants to chat as well. I feel a bit like a queen waiting to receive her tributes, lol. But since I have the day off people have just offered to drop by with cards and to say hi. I am extremely grateful.

We just had a brown out with our electricity. No weather to speak of, blue skies and no clouds or wind. Just sunshine and warmth. So I had better get this posted before it happens again! Thanks for reading and thank you so much for your concerns. I appreciate the suggestions. Stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Slow But Focused

This morning I am in a bit better headspace. I hope the day goes well. I think I will be busy today as my liquor order should be waiting for me. With the locks changed I don’t know as anyone else will make the effort. I could be wrong. We shall see.

I still haven’t gotten my car in about my brakes. No answer from my mechanic yesterday. I can limp the car to and from work but more than that and I have to borrow Chris’s truck. Poor Stella has not been for a walk all week.

I did my best to try to relax yesterday. I did notice my anxiety still kicking in. I don’t think my mind will do a shut down like Tuesday. I don’t know what everyone will say either. Speaking of which I need to get myself together and head out the door for work. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, anxiety, Cooking/Baking, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Food, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Choices

I didn’t cough once last night so I managed to get solid sleep. I still feel a bit off though. Today is my “make your own schedule” day. My goal is to be to work by 10am and get things filled as best I can. My liquor order is sadly non-existent. Over half of what I ordered is unavailable. Sooooo this week’s order will be pretty big. We have sold out of a lot. I am trying to come up with new gimmicks for my various departments. I am bringing in gluten free beer (this is actually for Chris, but I figured he can’t be the only beer drinker that doesn’t do gluten) and I want to put little signs with the new stuff like “Goes great in orange juice!” (this will go by a new peach vodka I am trying… and yes it does since I tried it before I recommended it). So we will see if this goes well or not. I am still working on my course (I need to really buckle down on this on my next day off) and recipes. If any of you have any recipes for either cocktails that you like or food dishes that use alcohol feel free to recommend them.

I am really bothered by what I am hearing out back. It is a very angry dog. It sounds like someone is taunting it because I hear snarls and angry barks then laughter (from a child). Now if something happens it is the dog’s fault. Not the individual antagonizing it. That really ticks me off. Take responsibility for provoking the animal and creating the situation! I see that way too much. And the angry dog noises from out behind us I seem to hear atleast once a day. I am glad that we have a sturdy fence. I don’t want any dog fights if the dog does get loose.

I tried working out yesterday but my body is rebelling against it. My joints feel like there are pinched nerves (especially my lower body). My lower back is also having none of it. I can feel things becoming enflamed again. So I guess no working out for me. I need to figure out what else to do. The yoga seems to be ok but not if I do it every day. (Pardon the rhyme.) If I do it every day then my body starts to do the same thing as doing an exercise routine. I am worried that with the cold weather coming up that everything will start clenching and hurting again. With the warmer weather my muscles will relax some. With the cold comes shivering etc.

I see that I need to wrap this up. Stella has been out here with me (when she’s not out enjoying the sun). I am going to hate to shut the sliding glass door when I leave but I don’t want to leave it unlocked while Chris is sleeping. I hope you have an amazing day! Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Food, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, Tattoos, Thinking, Travel, Writing

A Little Sun, But Not Too Much

The morning has dawned cool and dark. Not a bad thing. Yesterday did not get outrageously hot. I don’t think today will either. Storms are supposed to roll through this afternoon. I can’t quite get rid of this cough. I feel bad because Chris is trying to sleep in the other room. Then there is the coughing in public. Everyone freaks out. The pollen factor on top of it all just sets the throat tickles off.

I didn’t do much of anything constructive yesterday. I’m not sure if that is good or bad. I got lucky and my meeting was Zoomed and pretty cut and dry. I was able to get that article written this morning in no time at all. I sat down to look at next week’s schedule for myself. I have a meeting next Thursday night and my tattoo fix (I hope) that Sunday. Then Monday I have two meetings. One in the morning and the other that night. I need to figure out what I am doing with my departments as well. I am adding new liquors where I can. I am trying to put together the newsletter for work as well. I hope to do the food parings/cooking with alcohol this Fall. I need a list of recipes and figure out my format. One of my liquor reps was very enthusiastic about the idea of cooking with liquor classes. Sooo…. But I need to find my rhythm with it all. I did make some progress on my course. I might do some before work. It will depend on how much time I have.

I am starting to think about my tattoo appointment. I am not sure what I will do if he cancels again. This will be the third appointment. I think he should be the one to fix it instead of me paying twice (him for the original piece and then someone else to get it fixed) but I am not going to keep doing the round and round with the appointments. This will be his last chance. I just want it fixed so I can be happy with it. I have spent all Summer with this embarrassment on my thigh.

Stella has come out of the bedroom. She has curled up at the end of the couch. It looks as though the clouds are trying to clear. I hope they don’t. Folks could use a break. Of course, I type that and the sun comes out, lol. I think I might take Stella for a walk. I’m not sure where. Here would be the most convenient. But the park is good for both of us. I need to get myself some tennis shoes to wear at one point. Flip flops aren’t the best but it’s what I have. I guess I will wrap this up and take her to the park. Everything is long and scratchy in the back 40 which means her belly and my legs get it. And she needs to get out more. I will try to snap a few photos right now to share. I’ve not been taking many lately. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Bad night

I am not in a good head space today. A good portion of that is because I did not get doodlie for sleep last night. My throat kept getting too dry and would set off a tickle. I would drink some water and try to sleep in a different position. A few minutes later (about the time I fell back asleep) it would happen all over again. By the time Chris got to bed I was angry and went to sleep on the couch. That was around 4am. So from around 4am to say 8:20…. not even that because I kept trying to see the clock from the couch. So not even 4 hours of solid sleep. I may have to sleep on the couch until this cough goes away. We’ll see how tonight goes.

Yesterday all in all was a good day. I got some gardening done, Stella and I went to the park for a walk (bad idea as I had trouble breathing once we got going), I wrote two pages in my journal, I read some, I spent quality time outside, I did dishes, oh and I got a few exercises in as well while I was watching tv. Stella did a lot of running after her ball so she was happy.

I see a lot of things that I need to be working on. I am trying not to see all of them at once. But when you notice one then you tend to notice more. I am trying not be overwhelmed. Today I will just shut down if I let myself go down that road.

There is a 20 cent discount on gas at work today. I may go later to gas up. If I go now it will be crazy. Or I may not go at all. The sun is out and I wish it was gloomy. I am just not feeling it today. Sorry this is so blah and down. I will wrap this up since I can’t seem to find the positive right now. Thanks for reading and stay safe.

anxiety, Automotive, Books, Creativity, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Food, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Travel, Writing

Try, Try Again

Summer seems to be going by so fast. We are already into July! But things have gotten done. Goals have been met. I just need to keep moving forward with it all. I need to do my class for the demos yet. Since my laptops are linked (same one just newer so the link was automatic… and no my boss did not know when he bought it) I will use my work laptop to take the class. I also want to get a rough draft of a newsletter done to show everyone. I want to see what they think and what they want to change or tweak.

On my personal front I did get my 15 minutes working on my novel before work. I got about a page done. I am forcing my brain to focus on it again. Once I get back into the story, I can get writing but making myself sit and focus on just that. That is the task. I made my list yesterday with the help of a master list I had pulled together last month. I have been drinking more water, but I did not exercise at all. I need to come up with a plan of action for that one. My goal is say 15 minutes a day. Just like my writing. It is a small and doable chunk of time. But each day will bring its own challenges. Maybe just a few simple stretches and call it good.

Tomorrow will be busy as I am opening manager than tomorrow night, I have my first meeting since I have been back. I need to remember to record my miles. It is such a simple thing, but I always seem to forget. (I get paid a set amount by the paper, but I need the mileage for income taxes.) So tomorrow’s post will be a bit brief. I am hoping to get my stuff done between jobs tomorrow, but we’ll see what happens. I am trying to go with the flow. Do as best I can each day and not beat myself up. Some days go better than others. Speaking of which I need to wrap this up and get things going before work. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Friends, Gardening, Guitar, Learning, Life, Love, Motorcycles, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Riding, Thinking, Writing

Finding a Balance. Finding Me.

Another morning… We have company so I am overly self-conscious about how much noise I am making. I guess it is an excuse to write and read. I don’t really feel like doing either. I slept in since I don’t have to be to work until noon. I feel like I should’ve gotten up at my normal time. But what would it have accomplished? I would still get the same amount done and make the same comment that I should’ve gotten up earlier.

I am struggling to find a balance of some kind. There are things that I want to do/start but don’t. Yoga is a good example. My mind wonders when I am going to squeeze it in on workdays. There is my writing. This is the only consistent writing I am doing right now. My journaling is sporadic, and my novel has stalled out. My gardens… I am doing pretty well on all things considered. But I still have to get those raised gardens done and my rock garden cleaned out. And the backyard mowed. Stella still has no harness and our walks have become fewer and fewer. My motorcycle needs to be ridden. I need to keep pushing with my guitar. There is keeping in contact with friends and family (I suck at it, but I try).

I bust tail at work and do my best to get things done around the house and for us when I am home. It just feels like there is so much! I have thought about a schedule like Mondays I do this and Tuesdays that. But with my schedule I have to fit things in when I have time. So I don’t know what to do.

I also find myself saying that I will do things for others and then drop the ball. I have the best intentions but I either don’t have the time or… don’t have the time it seems. I can’t pare back anymore. Next week is my last week off from the paper. It will be good to be back. If they still want me. We’ll see. I will shoot out an email once I post this. I should wrap this up. No rain is in the forecast so I may put my hammock swing back up. And Stella needs a walk. Even if it is just on our property.

Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Aging, Animals, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Food, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Overcast With a Chance of Creativity

This morning I am finding it hard to find a place that doesn’t hurt. Last night I couldn’t eat the excellent dinner that Chris made us. Beef kabobs, rice, and asparagus. It looked so good. But for whatever reason my stomach started. I ended up in bed with a little bucket next to me. It pretty much lasted all night. My body was rebelling everything. Even water made me nauseous.

I do feel better this morning. I even got up extra early (I went to bed extra early). I am hoping to get some writing done as well as some yoga. It feels like a good time to bring that back into my life. Stella is on the love seat behind me dreaming of chasing something. Chipmunks and birds seem to be a focus lately. A bird flew in the house yesterday (flew right back out fortunately) and this morning as I was standing on the back porch a chipmunk ran right up next to me and sat. We have a lot of animals here, but the direct contact doesn’t happen often. It’s more observation.

For whatever reason I have been thinking of one of my best friends through school lately. (Those of you who are my long-time readers might remember a few years ago when I found out that she had commit suicide.) While I was lying in bed debating on actually getting up or not, I started remembering things we did together. We were very close. I still have several of the gifts she got me over the years. One of them is a small Paddington Bear. I had always been a Pooh Bear girl, and this was my first exposure to Paddington. (I never really loved orange marmalade until I was an adult though.) Anyway, I pulled Paddington off my desk in our bedroom as I came out here this morning. He is stanning to right of my laptop as I type this.

I don’t know what my plans today are. As much as I want to garden, I don’t know if my wrist is up for it (I sprained it Saturday at work). I have seeds that need to get in the ground. But before that can happen, I have to clean out the raised beds. My wrist is really starting to hurt with this small effort. I don’t think holding and shaking machine or pulling weeds will help. Using a pen probably won’t help either but it will be easier on the rest of my body.

The sun was out and shining when we got up but now it has become overcast. I might put my swing up again (a sure sign that it will rain). I am trying to get myself to write in other places of the house and yard. I have the table in the breakfast nook, a desk in our bedroom, a desk in my office, my little chair and bistro set on the back porch (apparently expensive since my hands tried to type “porsche”), my swing, the ground (I pull out my Minion quilt and we sit on it) and my big blue Adirondack chair. So far nothing out of the normal, that being here on the floor at the table, on the love seat or in bed. Today might be a good day to start that as well.

I see that this is becoming extra-long so I will stop here. A big thank you to everyone who has reached out to me. I really appreciate the support. As always thanks for reading and stay safe!

Animals, anxiety, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, Exercise, family, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Nature, Photography, retail, Thinking, Writing

Feeling… Accomplished

The morning has dawned very cool. Not a bad thing after yesterday’s heat. I enjoy the contrast. I did a bit too much yesterday and am paying for it now. But I got so much done! The front gardens are completely done and the front yard has been mowed. I even got some ant stuff out (I’m not sure if it kills them or just sends them someplace else… either is fine with me). I am very proud of what I got accomplished.

Stella and I went for a walk on the property before I got started. We had to stop at the garage for a rest because she was too tired. I felt bad because by the time I had finished everything outside I hopped into the shower. Once I was done with that my body said, “No more!” and I was done. I did throw her ball several times but I don’t think it was enough for her. Right now she is snoozing after her roam of the backyard.

I dread to see what chaos I will be walking into today at work. It has been a bit of a mess over the holiday weekend. I am glad I took the month off from the paper. I know that my frustration would show on the page. But I got enough done at the house that I don’t feel like I need another day to “finish up.” Does that make sense? I have more to do for sure but I got what I intended to done and I really do need a few days to recover. (I took four big wheelbarrows full of stuff from the gardens yesterday!)

She just looks so sweet there sleeping with her head on the arm of the couch… I forgot to take photos to share with you (I did with my phone but those take up a ton of space on here when I upload them) so I need to sneak out there and take a few. I still have a lot from the other day to share as well. I hate to wake her but if I am going to get this posted I need to get out there with my camera. I hope to get some other writing done as well before work. Oh, and I have to be back at 6:30am so tomorrows post might be light. Onward and upward! Thanks for reading and stay safe!