Aging, Animals, anxiety, Books, Creativity, Dogs, dreams, Emotions, family, Friends, Gardening, Learning, Life, Love, Medical, Nature, Photography, retail, the World, Thinking, Writing

Feeling Like a Bad Spice Cake, Too Much of Everything

I just can’t seem to get enough sleep lately. No matter what time I go to bed I feel the same when I get up. Last night I slept especially hard and I honestly feel awful right now. Today will be a 10 hour day but I have tomorrow off. I honestly have no idea what I should do tomorrow. There is so much that needs to be done around here. The only thing I have kept up on is laundry.

The sun is out and I don’t really want it to be. It can be a dark dreary day today. There are plenty of clouds still out. Did I mention all I want to do is sleep? With everything going around at work I will be upset if I get sick again. Not surprised though. I watch people cough either right out without covering their face or they cough into their hand and then touch things. And this from some of the ones that “can’t afford to get sick.” (*eye roll*)

I had a bit of news last night that was well…. unsettling. For me atleast. For most people they would be over the moon and excited and proud and….. Then there’s me. My eldest son (the one I just started keeping in touch with last year) messaged me that he and his wife are expecting. I can’t wrap my head around that. I messaged Mom but she is very blah about it. (I told her briefly about Essie and that I might not answer messages for a bit. I don’t really want to talk to her about Essie because the last scare we had with Essie Mom (well intentioned) told me I needed to do what was best for Essie. If she does that right now I know that I will lay into her. She has no place to tell me that after some of the things she…. no. I am not going there.) I want to tell her that Essie is doing well but I dread the possibility of “that” conversation.

I got some work done on the novel yesterday. Frustratingly enough I seem to have made more backstory questions for myself. Even if the reader never knows about half of what I have created I need to have the history of this village in my head and/or on paper. I have to laugh. For every page of novel I write I end up with two or three pages of backstory that I have to come up with! On the plus side I am very interested in the characters and their backstory so it is not a chore to get to the nuts and bolts of things.

I guess I should wrap things up. I want to try to wake up before work. I am closing manager so I need to be focused and alert. Not dozing. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s