Aging, Animals, anxiety, Automotive, Books, Creativity, Emotions, family, Learning, Life, Love, Motorcycles, Movies, Nature, Photography, Reading, retail, Riding, the World, Thinking, Writing

Head Examined

Bah humbug. It has dawned dark and white. What really worries me is that under the white stuff is a very thick layer of ice. Several inches worth. And I was also hoping that it would turn to rain so that Chris could go for a birthday ride on his motorcycle before putting her up for the winter. Instead, it is just cold and blah. Atleast it was beautiful for his party. I am very grateful for that.

I had hoped to get Chris one more gift but with my smaller paycheck this week it won’t be possible. I also need to fill up Angus. Thankfully we are doing 20¢ off a gallon today at work so I think at one point I will drive in and gas up. That should keep me for a few weeks even with trips to Elk Rapids for meetings. I am so grateful to live close to work! Not only don’t I go through near as much gas as I used to but I get gas discounts! (I would get the gas discounts anyway because it is a text message thing not an employee thing but I wouldn’t know what it really was unless I was there on a regular basis.)

I am a bit disappointed in myself. I did nothing yesterday. I didn’t even watch the movies I had lined up for the day. I keep telling myself that it is ok. I needed a day of nothing but still…. I am hoping to get some writing time in today. This was the only writing I did yesterday. I am dragging my feet because I don’t like where the story is going. It makes sense but it is not what I wanted the story to become. But I fear that is where it is going to go. So instead of working on that I have been losing myself in my “cozy” mysteries. Namely the Jacquline Kirby ones by Elizabeth Peters. Kirby has long been a hero of mine. Reading her escapades always makes me feel better, stronger. So I am going through the last in the series. Nevermind that I have a borrowed book as well as research books that I need to be reading. And several review-if-I-want-to books on my Kindle.

I keep hoping that I will…. want to write? No, that’s not what I mean. Hmmm. Find the courage to write? Closer but still not quite it. You see if I don’t write in the morning then I don’t feel that I can. Once the household is up and awake for the day my momentum just stops when it comes to writing. Right now I feel energized and ready to go. I can also get a second wind at night. Usually after dark but if I am involved in family time the I try to hold off. (It is a catch 22. I don’t have a lot of family time so when I do I tend to just focus on that. But I so want to get to my writing.) And once I finish this I will find lots of things to do before I pick up my pen. Usually enough to get me to when Chris wakes up and then I am angry at myself for wasting my own time. Here’s the kicker…. if I actually do sit down and write then when he gets up I am very pleased with myself. So why do I sabotage myself?

I see that I am going to have to step up my bird feeder game. There are so many birds out there after this first ice/snow of the season. I think I will start putting suet out as well. It is hard during the summer months because it tends to melt (even if it is frozen when I put it out). So I try to save it for the colder ones. I think I have two in the freezer right now. I may put them out later.

Ok, I need to wrap this up. I got a bunch of photos as the day progressed yesterday. The dark brooding skies offset the colors in the trees beautifully! I hope you like them! Thanks for reading and commenting! Stay safe!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s