It’s funny how I can fake not hurting when I talk to people but when I write I feel everything. I should be happy today but I’m not. I feel even more hurt. I can’t hide it in my writing. I’ve tried. I tried writing about other things and can’t get past one sentence and it all dries up. So I guess I will let out a little of the hurt on to the page and see if that helps.
Yesterday I tried my best to be happy and I faked it pretty well. Everyone seemed to think that I was back to my old self. But as I told my manager it was either do that or cry. I haven’t told anyone why. Telling the story just makes it hurt more. And I get enough random reminders via the news and local conversations. I just feel like one big emotional bruise.
But I have things to accomplish today. I promised the writer that I am interviewing that I would send her the interview questions (she is sick and doesn’t want to share) either last night or today. I also have to atleast get two articles written for my online editor. I hate that I have put them off but there was just no way I could write anything. But I have people that I promised articles to and I need to step up. Maybe this will help I don’t know.
Only two more days until I get my next day off. I am very excited that it is so close. Even though most of my shifts are shorter it is still a long stretch for me. The sun is out again today. Full and bright this time. I think that will help. Essie is already bugging me to play (she let me sleep until 8:30am this morning). So I guess I’d better wrap this up so I can get things written. I did take a few photos this morning while the girls ate and went potty. I’ll add those. Thanks for listening to me ramble and thank you to those that have reached out over the past few posts. I really appreciate it. Stay safe.