I guess I should’ve done this first. The wind has really picked up and the lights have been flickering. But I needed to get my ideas down on paper before they were lost. I kept them in my head while I made the kids breakfast but as soon as they came inside from going potty I sat down with a pencil and paper. I had a review mostly finished but I didn’t like it. I could’ve turned it in a week ago but I just didn’t like it. This version seems to flow better. I hope the editor thinks so as well.
Yesterday was bitterly cold (19F before the windchill which brought things down into the negative numbers (-7C before windchill)). I spent most of my shift outside and honestly you don’t realize how tight you keep your muscles until you finally warm up and relax. Then you feel like you’ve been busting tail at the gym all day! This morning’s wind is spooking Essie. Moose is just staring at me. Stella is asleep on her back behind me. The Weather Channel app on my phone says the wind is 17mph but I call bs. It’s a lot stronger than that. Trees are bending sideways out there.
I have been slowly trying to get myself out of this dark place I have been in. A little at a time. Everyone seems to think all is well but it’s not. I am just not showing what is happening on the inside. Each day is a struggle to convince myself that I can move forward. I get tired of faking it so I just don’t interact with people as much.
Before I talk myself into a place I don’t want to go (I tend to get back into my feelings as I talk about them) I am going to stop here and go back to my review. I hope everyone has a great day and thanks for reading. ❤️