Dogs, Emotions, Life, Motorcycles, Thinking

Feeling In a Funk

I should be in a better frame of mind.  But I’m not.  Anxiety is kicking in.  Today should be beautiful.  I don’t know if that will help.  I probably could’ve slept in but Essie needed to go out and I couldn’t shut my mind up.  So here we are.

I have a lot of reading to do this weekend.  I also need to make sure we do our training as well.  With everything that was going on yesterday I never did it.  Now that I’m thinking it I should’ve realized that I would feel like this today.  Whenever I have a really good day the next day seems to just put me in a funk.  I need to go out and back into Traverse again when I am done with this.  I am 60 cents short for a bill that will come out on Monday.  So I have to scrounge my coins for that and drive back in.  I may or may not take the kids.  This early I hate to have them make too much fuss because Chris is sleeping.

For once I have the time to write.  But I’m sitting here staring at the screen listening to the dogs sleep.  Moose has the occasional nasally intake of air.  Essie you can hear breathe interspersed with the occasional snore.  Stella just readjusted herself and sighed sounding just like a human.  (Note to self: if you need to make corrections do it when it happens because if you go back and try to fix it you will have to rewrite what you have written.  I don’t know why computers do this.  One day you can go and edit and be fine then the next you try to edit the same way and as you type your changes in you are literally typing over what is already written.  It won’t just change a word for you.  You delete a letter and try to retype it it just continues right over the top of what you have written.  Very frustrating because you never know when the computer will change back and forth from one format to the other.)

I guess all the death in the news this morning did not help.  There was a massive crash that involved six motorcycles and a truck (domestic not a semi).  I think it was in New Hampshire.  Many dead.  Then there is the random violence you read about everyday that seems to pop out more when I feel like this.  A man shot is fiancée’s Mom and killed her.  But I keep coming back to the motorcycle deaths.  There seem to be more this year.  Well each year to be truthful.  And with the week of idiots almost upon us (Traverse City is the Cherry Capital of the World and as such we have Cherry Fest every year the week of the 4th of July which means that we and inundated with tourists) I hesitate to ride my bike.  Atleast we are not in Traverse but we still get our share of them.  And they are too busy gawking at the water, each other, their phones trying to take pictures or trying to figure out how to get somewhere to be bothered with driving.  (Dammit.  I see a typo further up in the paragraph and I can’t fix it without rewriting the whole damn paragraph.)  I just don’t want to deal with the bullshit.  We are expected to be nice and grateful because they are bringing all this money to the area.  But what they are bringing is more stupid people on the roads, price hikes in everything for the locals, crowds all over…. Sorry.  I worked retail too long.  I will stop.

I also see by the clock that I can head out to the bank soon.  I think I will leave the kids here.  I am anxious enough.  This morning I will worry that I will get in an accident with them in the car.  Yes, that is how my mind is working this morning.  And I am getting angry because everytime I go to change something or if I miss a space the damn machine starts overwriting everything.  Time to step away before I get too angry.

I hope everyone has a good day…

1 thought on “Feeling In a Funk”

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