I am happily surprised at the amount of positive I feel right now. Last night was full of rain and two scared dogs (it seems that once any of our dogs get to 9 years and older the simpler things like a steady rain on the AC unit scares them… no idea why). Not much steady sleep but really that is ok. I have gotten up and I have my day planned out before me. I have things to accomplish forward directions to move.
I got things done yesterday (we made our first batch of the apple treats we sell and the testers agreed that they were indeed good) but it didn’t fill me. I didn’t feel as though I was moving forward. I felt as if I was getting things done to do them. So I could sigh and proclaim, “Finally! This is done!”
This morning I am doing and happy about it. I’m not sure why the change (the fact that we got rain instead of snow and the snow we have is melting? the fact that I can smell Spring in the air when I let the dogs out?) but I am grateful for it. I have taken care of a few little things once the kids were up. Some major projects will have to wait until Chris gets up.
It is like someone flipped a switch and I am happy again. I know that the bad stuff is there and I look at it, even touch it to make sure it is real (that’s when I can feel the anxiety slowly roll towards me like a tail of fresh lava) but that doesn’t change the happiness and positive feelings. Now I fully realize this may or may not change but I am going to bask in it for as long as I can. I have missed being happy and believing in myself.
I hope each one of you finds atleast one thing to be truly happy about today. Cheers!
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Very nice, Jen. We all have “nothing is wrong but I feel horrible” days. Glad you are getting around it!
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