Creating Me

This morning is a struggle.  I am not a morning person so the fact that it is still dark helps.  Morning is best for me to get my creative stuff done in private and quietly.  With Chris working nights I just get up at 7am with the dogs, fed them and let them out then I settle in front of the laptop for a few hours to get my writing done.

As I try to focus and type I fight not to pick up the phone to add a phone number from a friend to my contacts list that I forgot to do last night.  Then there are emails to be scanned.  Then …..  You get the point.  This is a morning that I have hope to do some  decent writing but my mind is just spinning its wheels.  I take another swig of coffee and stare at the screen and keyboard alternately.

Reading Natalie Goldberg’s The True Secret of Writing: Connecting Lifer with Language has helped me a lot.  It was one of those books you pick up and read a little bit then you’d put it down and sort of forget you had it but find it again and start reading it from the beginning because it had been long enough that you’d forgotten what you had already read.  But I’m glad a found it again because it helped a lot.  Her books usually do.  I was lucky enough to meet her years ago when she came to Ann Arbor, Michigan for a book signing.  Mom got me her first book, Writing Down the Bones when I first started getting serious about writing.  That was many years ago.

I find myself asking what kind of writing do I want to do?  Just blogging?  Book reviews?  Articles?  Stories?  Novels?  I have written in all these forms but I cannot find one that I am completely happy with.  I still feel something missing.  So I paw through my multitude of books on writing and creativity to see if anything is what I need right now.  I feel on the cusp of something.  Hopefully something wonderful.